jessay

boink

[conner @winterweather]

me and my homeboy did this to a guy behind a wendy’s once and he died

[REZI @HeyTerezi]

build new talent? nah, push the 40 year old alcoholic who can't even do a neckbreaker bump properly 🗣️🗣️🗣️ THIS IS WHAT WE DO 🗣️🗣️🗣️

[Nikolaj🇺🇦🇵🇸 @nikicaga]

White people be like "I got kicked out of a long Covid WhatsApp support group for being Israeli"

[SMART and listener @isalrightnow]

thats far enough mr bond. my two handsome sons will ensure you do not leave this island alive

[Melanie D'Arrigo @DarrigoMelanie]

It should be bigger news that Jeffrey Epstein’s billionaire associate, who is contracted to build Trump’s mass surveillance state, is hosting a secretive retreat with other oligarchs to discuss cult-building, World War 3-prepping, and get sex tips.

Epstein Island never ended.

[jessay @jamesjessay]

We went to the same high school and have had similar mentally ill (homicidal) thoughts towards those who have wronged us I’ll always be #teamdreamer

[Wrestle Ops @WrestleOps]

Tommy Dreamer has departed TNA.

The latest name in a series of departures from the company.

[momin @mominasir99]

a real stalker fears no instagram plus

[jessay @jamesjessay]

This ended up being a common scam call AND a lesson to myself that I gotta fucking relax bc I was planning out how I was gonna pull up on the deadbeat and get all the money he owes me

[jessay @jamesjessay]

Just got a voicemail meant for my former stepdad from a process server giving him a heads up that they’re coming by tomorrow to serve him papers. Will I be giving him a heads up? No. Will I be egging his house now that I have his new address?

[Josie Stratman @JosieStratman]

Mayor Mamdani tells graduates at Rikers Island “there will always be a place for you in NYC.”

“If today is proof of anything, it is that you have the power to move your life forward, even when everything feels like it is pulling you backwards.”

[jessay @jamesjessay]

Just got a voicemail meant for my former stepdad from a process server giving him a heads up that they’re coming by tomorrow to serve him papers. Will I be giving him a heads up? No. Will I be egging his house now that I have his new address?

[s∅up @Soupakuo]

i’m crying son

[big content guy @bigcontentguy]

spain fans are like “we thuck thoooo bad”

[jbolina jolie @pastapilled]

"my parents wouldn't let me watch SpongeBob and I turned out fine" a caged bird thinks flying is an illness

[Adam Reich @ReichNow]

Powerful words. Hope @NJTRANSIT and @njtransit_ca actively solicit her advice for improving accessibility for the rest of the World Cup and other special events, particularly at MetLife.

[Ale @aliasvaughn]

The fact WH is fretting about this is incriminating in and of itself. Also… Let me be clear: if the reporters actually got incriminating recordings and they sat on them to publish a book instead of breaking news, that is a complete dereliction of duty.

[Fairy Gothmother, MD @jenny2x4]

The delusion here is incredible. First, there was never anything edgy about The Office, but to say this when the two longest running comedies still being made today are South Park and It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia lol

[A.J. Perez @byajperez]

Eric Trump trying to squeeze UFC Hall of Famer/broadcaster Dan Cormier for inside info is disgusting. @danawhite has to be pleased members of the Trump family think UFC is fixed. Cormier deleted the tweet (below) within a couple minutes.

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

The White House is crashing out because The Weather Channel reported the weather 🤣

[cold 🥑 @coldhealing]

Boomer cultural dominance is so bad that you can watch your own son drop 45 to win the NBA Finals and immediately start talking about some guy from the 90s

[Mike Nellis @MikeNellis]

If The New York Times got its hands on leaked audio recordings from the Situation Room, then we have a massive national security crisis on our hands. That very likely means our enemies know everything that’s been said in that room, at least since Trump took over.

This should be a massive scandal.