Janderson 🦎

Primary school teacher who likes running and Prosecco.

[Paul Garvey. @PaulGarvey4]

School- term Holidays!!

Just give all parents/carers the right to take one week, just one week, at any time of the year except exam time - let the school decide on that - and much of the problem would disappear overnight.

The kids would not suffer one jot.

RT, if you agree.

[Matthew Highton @MattHighton]

Rufio, Rufio, Ru-fi-oooooooooo…

[Guz Khan 🥶 @GuzKhanOfficial]

Sorry?

Boris Johnson, the former Prime Minister was allowed to lead this nation after calling Muslim Women “Letterboxes”, saying Africans had “Watermelon smiles” and gay men were “bum boys”

But Gary Lineker gets dropped from presenting a Football highlight show in just days?

[Janderson 🦎 @janderson_87]

@QuornFoods And hotdogs

[Janderson 🦎 @janderson_87]

@QuornFoods Battered sausages

[Margaret Hodge @margarethodge]

At least when Liz Truss was Prime Minister there were fresh vegetables to measure her time in office.

[Adam Kay @amateuradam]

I mean, I'd have probably spelled CORONATION right, but whatever.

[Spotlighting Sarah Lancashire @CulturalEpiph]

"Catherine spent 16 years worrying that when it came to her grandson, the apple wouldn’t fall far from the tree, never realising that she’s the tree."-Louisa Mellor (Den of Geek, 2023) #SarahLancashire #HappyValley #HappyValleyFinale
https://t.co/53FpdK7bg7
📸:BBC/Cap & Edit: CE

[Oliver Cook @OGMCookie]

Rita Ora: “I think it could be Charlie…”

*literally every single Busted fan*

“SIMPSON!!!”

Rita: “… Puth”

Nevermind @RitaOra…

#MaskedSingerUK

[Roman Kemp @romankemp]

My mum: I’ve no interest in being famous anymore

Also my mum:

[Matthew Highton @MattHighton]

Hear me out: We get all the Royal Family together, a camera crew, a couple of robes and send Claudia Winkleman in.

[Eddie Kidd @edkidd01]

I think you’ll care when I… tell you what… the complaint is…

@shazwwfc @leepimpleroy @Celtergeist12 @ObiWan_Jabroni_ @WernhamBlogg @OutOfOfficePod_ @rickygervais @kingrob32 @robdelcraig @RichTheRed252 @DavidBrentMovie @

[Sahil Bloom @SahilBloom]

Today is my 32nd birthday.

Over the last month, I asked several 90-year-olds what advice they would give to their 32-year-old selves.

Here's the life advice everyone needs to hear:

[Mark Gatiss 💙 @Markgatiss]

#TheTraitors Best telly in donkeys.
Takeaways:
1) Linear TV isn’t dead.
2) Aaron.
3) Aaron’s trousers.
4) AMANDA.
5) Aaron again.
6) John was evil incarnate.
7) Aaron’s sublime innocence. Also his trousers.
8) Claudia’s jumpers.
9) Meryl still doesn’t know what’s going on.

[Janderson 🦎 @janderson_87]

Desperately don’t want Wilf to win #TheTraitors I could never do that!

[Louise Bird @TheBird90]

Two glasses of wine in me and I’d be going round telling everyone I’m the traitor and asking them not to say anything 😂 #TheTraitors

[Mr G @DeputyGrocott]

Has someone added a day to this week?

[Have I Got News For You @haveigotnews]

As nurses join those taking strike action, No 10 insists everything's perfectly fine as long as you don’t fall over, get ill, need to eat, want to buy anything, send anything, or travel anywhere.

[Specsavers @Specsavers]

We need to sponsor VAR don’t we