Andre

for bookings call 999

[Andre @jandrethefirst]

#maragang

[lx!!sz'zs ϑ୧ @yluhyh]

ontem eu fui fazer uma posição na cama e sem querer cambalhotei

[Synth Potato🥔 @SynthPotato]

Opening Netflix on August 27 to watch GTA 6 Gameplay only to witness Rockstar publicly annihilating the leakers instead

[The King In The North @KingInThe2North]

Rockstar Games threatened to sue CyberLeek.… CyberLeek: drops a new GTA 6 trailer 💀💀

#GTA6 #GTAVI #GTA6Leaks #CyberLeek

[Citizen TV Kenya @citizentvkenya]

"Sifuna chukua Olivia, Kajwang chukua Scovia..."

"Usiingize jina yangu hapo, usinivunjie ndoa.."

Light moment as Senators Kajwang, Sifuna trade polygamy jokes at Khalwale’s wife’s burial

[John Mutongoi @johnmtongoi]

Homa Bay Senator Moses Kajwang issued an apology during the funeral of Kakamega Senator Boni Khalwale's wife, saying that the violence that erupted during the Linda Mwananchi rally in Homa Bay was completely unacceptable.

[. • @innoutsane]

they don't tell you why it's called a job

J - we're going
O - to fucking
B - kill you nigga

[Kenyans.co.ke @Kenyans]

The only remaining job I have is to send Raila back to Bondo - President Ruto

[David Nahinga Π 🇰🇪✊🏿 @dnahinga]

Can we start asking whether public money should first provide water, electricity and schools in Lodwar before we spend KSh 900 million on a stadium that may sit largely empty for much of the year?

[Andre @jandrethefirst]

@kuwamocho_ Gari yenyewe inaenda pipeline ishasaidia guess😂

[Andre @jandrethefirst]

@Kenyans 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[Yoko @Kibet_bull]

A throwback in 2019 when Reuben Kiborek was charged for Defiling a 16 years old girl. He was 27 years old by then.

Yesterday he said that he should be locked inside with Gachagua and he will come out shouting tutam. He wants to do horizontal engineering to Gachagua???

[Andre @jandrethefirst]

@Chalbiwsk Reall

[Chalbi @Chalbiwsk]

I hate this infantile relationship that european ambassadors have with kenya. These guys engage in infantile shit that doesn’t move the needle whatsoever. they will board nganyas, do silly dances, eat street food, say vapid slogans etc. we don’t care about this PR stuff. We want technology transfers and access to your markets. Treat african countries the way u would treat china or US

[Britney @OwanghB]

Huwa nashangaa kama sisi wote watched someone get shot...for just selling masks
We all did
Kenyans forget very fast

[Rapcha The Sayantist @IAMRAPCHA]

Why can't you find yourself a job abroad, and let kenyans elect someone who will create jobs for them at home?

[MethoDman @polo_kimanii]

Hii nairobi sasa kuna rende ingine inaitwa the nairobi flying monkeys. This is a battalion of people in Nairobi who exist in this city dangerously. They play hide and seek with poverty everyday. Mtu hajaandikwa kazi,hawezi point aseme pale ndio nafanya kazi,but still they manage to pay rent,and some have even gone to the extent of buying cars. Hawa wanaishi kwa neema ya bwana,and they know it. Wanaendanga kusota kadeal kanatokea,wanarudi steady. They have done this for years. Na hawananga ata savings

Hawa ndio ile kitabu ya mathayo sita inaongelea,kuna mahali mungu anaambia watu yake, Look at the birds,they do not reap or store in barns,yet they do not sleep hungry. Is it not because they trust in me? These guys are very strong mentally. Wanajiaminia namna atari sana. Mtu anajua vizuri hajui kwenye atatoa rent end month,na saa hiyo tuko date 27,na hashtuki. Ako tu. Weh! Apana chesa na hii flying monkeys bwana

[solé @layxsnv]

Let’s go to the backseaattttt ???

[Citizen TV Kenya @citizentvkenya]

You Cannot Go To The Streets And Expect Police To Come Kiss You - Gachagua
https://t.co/9pDfgm8oYu

[Cop Shakur @CopShakurkihara]

Sifuna is loved and doesn't need Aisha Jumwa.

Kwanza, Aisha Jumwa lost the 2022 election by a big margin. She only got about 65,000 votes. We cannot contaminate a movement just because of Aisha Jumwa.

Aisha Jumwa will only tarnish the name of our movement. She was charged with murder. Who wants to associate himself with such?

I also remember when she grabbed the microphone from Sifuna during a function at the Coast.

[MUHUMUZA! @Joseph_Maaniii]

One thing I'll never be against is a woman's right to be nude.