mayor of Flavortown

a hoot and a half

[mayor of Flavortown @janerama_]

Lambs: they live sad, delicious lives

[mayor of Flavortown @janerama_]

Herbie 101

[mayor of Flavortown @janerama_]

Grey’s Anatomy should be renamed to Doctors Without Boundaries 🎀

[Janel Comeau 🍁 @VeryBadLlama]

can’t believe we opted for 1984 dystopia (surveillance and denial of historical fact) and Fahrenheit 451 dystopia (erosion of literacy) instead of Brave New World dystopia (everyone gets fucked up on government-sanctioned drugs and goes to the movies all the time)

[sebastian castillo @bartlebytaco]

if i was a bartender i would want to say stuff like “are you prepared to lose yourself in the dream of tequila?” and other sorts of sultry bon mots. i would wear a lot of eyeliner

[mayor of Flavortown @janerama_]

What is a soup sommelier if not a love potion brewer

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

not just a want, but a need

[mayor of Flavortown @janerama_]

Pika are cool because you are hiking thru a rock field of tiny triumphant squeaks from fuzzy hamster guys. As soon as you think youre too tired to keep moving, youll hear and see a tiny fluff cheering you on. It’s a magical experience

[anya 🪏 @yawnyaa]

call me a triangle with two equal sides the way i so sillies

[emily chickinson 🐓 @georgie61329]

Your body count is the number of people you’ve gotten into birding

[wicked wigger of the west @Nick_Cerveza]

My official statement to everyone who is upset by this tweet: Cash Cab is the far superior program. Goodnight

[jasper ⚖️ @gaylittlelawyer]

@resonantraven if that onion ring i'm picking up

[Alex @alexxmalloy]

summer is going to feel like this

[Old Man Rattle @oldrattle_]

arguing over which gatorade would be the hottest if they were girls

[mayor of Flavortown @janerama_]

@kailsmarie13 I wish to be your student

[Andrew Hilary🇵🇸 @AndrewHilaryUS]

I think Willem Dafoe would be a great Scrooge, but every other character should still be Muppets.

[mayor of Flavortown @janerama_]

Just got here and lmaooo

[BOOP @Pettyyyboop]

I like to throw soy sauce at sad people. Kikkoman while he’s down.