Secure people date each other and disappear from the dating pool quickly. The market gets saturated with avoidant and anxious people cycling through each other.
If you’re an able-bodied male with a halfway decent attitude you can be 99th percentile successful by:
-going hard in the gym
-putting 25% more effort in at work and getting promoted
Zero talent required. Jacked, healthy, wealthy, baddie wife, amazing life. ALL you need to do is have BASELINE level follow-through and not be a whiny little bitch.
You live in a world where:
-gyms, aux chords, and Christopher Nolan movies exist
-hot girls outnumber even moderately put-together dudes 2000 to 1
-every food item in the world has been hunted and gathered for you (grocery stores)
-you could be working 16 hour days in a coal mine in a 3rd world country breaking your lower back for less than $1
Motherfuckers are sitting on winning lottery tickets pissing them away on junk food and OnlyFans subscriptions (pixels on a screen) instead of sacking up asking out the baddie at their coffee shop. Or saying to their boss “hey sir I wanna make sure I understand this right could you explain it one more time” then knocking it out of the park like a chill/straightshooting gentleman. Like the cool Sophomore the Seniors loved because he hit hard and didn’t complain and was generous with his weed pen at parties.
The level of ingratitude in the world is INSANE.
There’s kids who live in wheelchairs. There’s kids who were born with disabilities. No Prom, no Shoulder Presses, no sleepovers with their best friends staying up til 2AM watching Superbad.
And you’re not SMASHING the gym like a grateful savage!? Eating healthy 90% of the time, calling your friends for no reason, CRUSHING it in your career, building yourself into a HERO for your wife!?
How are you not joyful AF borderline moved to tears everyday!? You’re spinning on a sphere in an infinite universe and the fact you’re alive is a 1 in 500 trillion - you’re so lucky it’s absurd and you have nothing to lose!
Go MAXIMIZE your potential and while you’re doing it have a BLAST!
My therapist told me:
“When a person grows up feeling unseen, they learn to love by over-giving. They pour into everyone else, hoping that, one day, someone will finally pour back into them. So they become the care taker. The fixer. The one who shows up, even when no one shows up for them.”
And the hardest part? Deep down, they're not trying to be strong. They're just waiting for someone to do for them what they've spent their whole life doing for everyone else.
If you want to keep healthy relationships in your life, you have to learn how to reconcile properly. When you mistreat or mishandle someone you love and care about, apologize and address it. Waiting for time to pass and hoping it gets better is never an apology.
I can't stress enough how important reassurance is especially for people who overthink. and I don't mean just in words but also in action. being there for someone and good communication are base level things in any relationship and I'm shocked how many of you don't realize it.
Nothing destroys your mental health faster than wasting time and effort on someone who does not choose you, they ignore your presence, dismiss your worth, and keep you trapped in false hope. Cut them off, protect your strength, and never sacrifice yourself for their indifference.
according to psychology, the biggest problem for overthinkers is when they get too attached to someone their entire mood depends on how other person responds to them. they are so attuned to other people's emotions that they can notice the slightest change in someone's behavior
between 25 and 30, a man faces his hardest battles, not with the world, but with himself. you realize the mistakes you've repeated for years and start breaking each cycle, one by one. this is the age where men either transform into kings or remain slaves to their past forever.