Jaumard 💙

French full stack web and mobile developer. #javascript #nodejs #flutter #opensource :)

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@luke_pighetti I just use hooks for this kind of use cases

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@hamza_imran75 @luke_pighetti Just don't use statefull at all, I think didn't write one since 4 years now and I'm happy^^

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@nlycskn @timsneath @_eseidel @filiphracek @bouncingsheep @mjohnsullivan @redbrogdon @MartinAguinis Already six years! Wow but looking at that brings back good memories :) it was fun!

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@FlutterDev Working on an app that allows people to find traffic problems in real time (closed road, jam, accidents...) also find cheapest fuel stations and parking places. You can also search for places and itineraries. Turn by turn navigation will probably come later
All in Switzerland :)

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@remi_rousselet J'y été en avril, profite bien c'est que du bonheur!

[Filip Hráček @filiphracek]

Remember my call for a proper audio engine for Flutter?
https://t.co/Id5ucY4OYL

Turns out there's `pkg:flutter_soloud`, which already does most of the things we need. I spent the last few weeks helping Marco, the author of the package, to make the API more Dart-isan.

So...

1/2

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@bernaferrari @luke_pighetti I'm using flutter hooks and have 0 stateful widget now 😁

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@elliothesp I'm available if you need 😜
Thanks for F3! It was super fun and interesting 😁

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

Was so nice to view @reNotANumber and @devangelslondon in F3 in Prague, since flutter conf in Warsaw! Let's keep in touch! ^^

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

Wonderful Photoshop capabilities! Impressive!

[Meï @MeixDev]

Fixed it, now @BeGuillaume gets to be a part of us ! #F3Prague

[Meï @MeixDev]

Post #F3Prague party is going great ! 👀💙

[Enzo Conty 💙 @EnzoConty]

🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷
Frenchies in #F3Prague !
@BeGuillaume is missing but we will photoshop his head on the pictures later on !

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@felangelov @_eseidel @shorebirddev Is it still 100% dart or is it transpired into JS (or something)

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@Wise Look like it's ok now thanks :)

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@Wise hey, trying to add some CHF to my account but look like your service is down, getting 503 and 504 on verification step.

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@felangelov Hey, Was wondering were would be the best place to give feedback about Frog? Is creating a GitHub issue ok for that?

[Jaumard 💙 @jaumard]

@enedis_clients Bonjour, votre site pour les raccordement ne marche plus https://t.co/15EjiXt70t impossible de finaliser la création du compte car je ne reçois pas le code par email. Et le bouton de renvoi du code se retrouve avec une erreur 404. Pourriez vous fixer?

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Here we go!! 🍿🍿

[Idriss J. Aberkane Ph.D x3 @idrissaberkane]

Si vous croyez que les bots influenceurs n’existent pas sur twitter, constatez ici comment une nuée de faux comptes vient répéter exactement le même message sur le réseau pour nuire à @elonmusk

Imaginez ce qu’il en fut de la Macronie et des comptes à seringues…