justin - 2%

i tend to speak other languages. i'm also a special education teacher or something like that. live laugh rage. whiskey town/little whiskey🇧🇷🇵🇷🇲🇽🇮🇹🇵🇸

[justin - 2% @jaychap27]

@gnash ur youngest fan?

[Josh Hart @joshhart]

Anyone ever have dark thoughts when they're alone...?

[Jalen Brunson @jalenbrunson1]

Nah bro no BS delete my number

[Vivian @suchnerve]

Violence is NOT the answer. The answer is *opens history book*

uh oh

*frantically starts flipping through pages*

uh oh. oh no. no no no. uh oh

[Matthew Zeitlin @MattZeitlin]

Rocky is an extremely handsome and charismatic guy and he grew up in Harlem so he became a rapper. If he had grown up in Traverse City, he would
have been a successful boat distributor, and in the early first century Levant, a great religious leader.

[Adam Friedland @AdamFriedland]

.@HunterBiden I’m a talk show host in New York City. I’d love to hear your story.

[justin - 2% @jaychap27]

My urologist after fondling my nutsack: “everything is where it needs to be”

[Stephen A Smith @stephenasmith]

The Stephen A. Smith Show on 710 ESPN LA comes on 9-11 pm Tonight. We will NOT discuss Kobe Bryant. We will, however, discuss the homosexual

[˖ Ridhima 𓂀 ݁˖ @ridhima_z]

they’ll put a data center in yo ass if you not paying attention

[Paul Reed @Bball_paul]

teachers say we dont read enough wtf we be doing on our fone

[baby yaga @yagadigital]

Kind of immune to schizophrenia because I could see a grey alien shopping at Dollarama and not really care. Not even remotely my problem

[justin - 2% @jaychap27]

me when i accidentally get on the pig train

[carl 🥦 @NightlifeMingus]

What’s good playboy

[we @kanwetwitty]

Jamaican coworker: would you like to listen to some music with homophobic lyrics each day while we work
Me: that would be a tropical delight

[sapphic white boy @bog_chaser]

38 y/o gf who still says “sweet summer child”: they’re debating whether PAWG is a slur and i just can’t with the hellsite today.

Me [heard “PAWG” and got so hard i got nauseous]: i think i hauve Covid

[Got CTE from playing Peek-a-Boo @doulbedoink]

Reports indicate that in October 2018 Rama Duwaji reposted a tweet stating that it was “lowkey bisexual for a grown man to order a milkshake.”

[Jackson @tree_bro]

*knocks on door* Mrs Smith? I'm from Army. Your son got owned in Iraq. He showed great valor in the face of epic fail. Semper fi or whatecer

[justin - 2% @jaychap27]

i think bombing anyone is bad, even if they’re bad. what the hell is going on

[Sydney Battle @SydneyBattle]

my 18yo cousin speaks a dialect of english that can only be described as “drake hit his head while being abducted by aliens and was then held captive by them for a few years”. when i talk on the phone with her i feel like amy adams in arrival but i do ultimately understand

[Boots, 'with the fur' @afraidofwasps]

(buzzer beater attempt to get on the school shooter's good side) Nice shot man ,

[Thomas White @len0killer]

Republicans: We need another civil war right now.

Democrats: Girl you gotta VOTE for it then💛💙

Nelly if he was a bullfrog: If you wanna come and eat a fly with me, swim around in the pond when we’re frisky, oh why do I love this lake (Hey! Bugs in my tummy!)