Jasmine Reed

“They were strawberries. It’s been so cold lately they turned blue.”- Friedrich Von Trapp

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

Tbh I often get dressed with the intention of looking like JFK on a boat

[Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred]

This meeting could have been an overnight visit from three ghosts

[tqsura @tqsura]

All quiet on the frontal lobe

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

This is how it feels to tell people I haven’t seen #Wicked

[bethany @thenightbethore]

just found out vienna waits for me

[هدية @aminahsarchive]

having to ask a class of first graders to open a book to page 67

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

“ I did really good… I just screamed a little in the beginning.”
- my nephew on his dentist appointment

[Big Choctaw @Derekalexander_]

sorry i didn't text back i got writer's block

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

Finished listening to Dune and thought it’d be fun to watch the 1984 version, but this is the vibe

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

One of them added me to his free trial family plan and now we have a friend streak going. I’m not even sure if we still follow each other on Instagram.

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

My new thing is friending guys on here, who I met on dating apps and texted, but never went out with. I’m not trying to get their attention in any significant way, I literally just enjoy giving them a high five for their perfect lessons, you know?

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

Heaven forbid a woman wants to escape to Arrakis

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

Heaven forbid a woman wants to escape to Narnia

[dudermane @612jack]

Come over bro we’re hanging out in a facility that also processes peanuts, tree nuts, wheat, soy, milk, and eggs

[hb @h3xenbrenner2]

It’s no big deal. We can settle this by fighting on top of a moving train

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

This feels good

[Thinkwert @Thinkwert]

What other tech has reached its final form?

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

My new thing is friending guys on here, who I met on dating apps and texted, but never went out with. I’m not trying to get their attention in any significant way, I literally just enjoy giving them a high five for their perfect lessons, you know?

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

Getting the hiccups while eating a sandwich is the worst thing that could happen to you.

[erika @yeeeerika]

i love the word 'also' because i'm never done talking

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

Swiping on dating apps at age 30 and vaguely recognizing everyone

[Jasmine Reed @jaz_j_hey]

Things are looking up