Jenn Smith

“...hoping for grits, but will settle for tater tots, just for the record.”

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

WATCHED METROPOLIS FOR THE FIRST TIME LOVED IT OK BYE

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

“Ugh, dog drama” was something I said out loud today. Thank you for your time. ✌️

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

Feeling v entrepreneurial rn 😎

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

Hi, how to I leave a bed with the perfect amount of warmth? Asking for a friend.

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

@lefteyeburns

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

@lefteyeburns Happy to access some “may I speak to your manager” energy on your behalf after years of biting my tongue when dealing with my HOA 🙃

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

@lefteyeburns

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

I scalded my right tonsil this morning, eating a dinner roll for breakfast… how’s your 2023?

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

Leaving dating apps in 2022! Looking forward to the constant paranoia that I’m talking to a spam bot not being a thing anymore 😎

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

Haha gotta love being both neurotic AND sleepy so I can overanalyze, forget, repeat

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

@KarenKilgariff you’ve said many times that no one wants to hear about the dreams people have… but what if I told you I just woke up from a dream where I took down an exploitative religious cult with large quantities of homemade slime? Surely there are exceptions 😂

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

@bluthquotes

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

@lefteyeburns

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

Hot take: art is occupying the same space, emotionally

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

@lefteyeburns 💔

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

@lefteyeburns

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

5-year-old: “who be you?”
Me: “who be YOU?”
5-year-old: “I be me”
Me: “me too!”

Best convo I’ve had in a while 😆

[Arrested Development @bluthquotes]

Lucille: I'll be in the hospital bar.

Michael: Uh, you know there isn't a hospital bar, Mother.

Lucille: Well, this is why people hate hospitals.

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

“A Serious Problem” a virus outbreak where the only symptom is losing your sense of humor… I won’t spill the beans about how the virus is transmitted tho

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

Brilliant ideas I get while managing pain and anxiety from having gallstones… you’re welcome in advance 😎

[Jenn Smith @jennsmithifer]

Highest stakes game of Red Rover, where you have run through a chain of zombies. It still needs characters, plot, blah, blah, blah but it’s def going to be called “Dead Rover”