Jess Bauer

I try to be nonchalant but I almost always end up being totally chalant

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

It’s always “is Pepsi ok?” never “are you ok?”

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

I thought this was an old Tiger Beat cover of Chase from Zoey 101

[chris🫖 @filmstvculture]

British Vogue really made Timothée Chalamet an 80s rock star

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

@zachgilford @JohnCena I think you’re cool, 7

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

I’m gonna cry, this is SUCH GOOD NEWS for me🥹

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

@Bisky2Necklace did you get promoted to Social Media Manager??

[U.S. Postal Service @USPS]

mail

[michael chakraverty 🍉 @mschakraverty]

bet they’re filming chocolate week in the bake off tent today

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

This man on hinge has “Jake Gyllenhaal dodged a bullet with Taylor Swift” on his profile…sir read the room. You will be single forever.

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

@asterroyds HAHAHA same. Have a wonderful Taylor Day, my friend. Cannot wait to hear your thoughts (ESPECIALLY about the 10 minute version of All Too Well. Pray for me lol)

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

@asterroyds I love that you are that guy and I, personally (even though I think I speak for the masses when I say this), LOVE this content. Keep it comin. 💖

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

Ok not to be rude but the photoshop cutout job on the hoodie is just…like don’t zoom in lmao

[HSHQ @HSHQ]

New Love On Tour hoodie now available in the Official Store.

https://t.co/jeroQOH8Nd

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

Leaving this here as a not-so-subtle hint to my friends and family on what to get me for Christmas…

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

Rewatching Friday Night Lights and crying (again) because Matt Saracen. @zachgilford713 why ya gotta do me like that?

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

Sadly not surprised at the RMU news. There was a clear lack of care and shift of priority—away from students, individuality, and overall quality—once Dr. Howard took office. As a student, it was disheartening and discouraging to see and experience. And I know my peers felt it.

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

@jimaaay302 If I’m honest, it could be any age bc I will still be single and still want to marry you.

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

@alexadenillo about Ariana grande: “I hope her music is still gonna be good now that she’s like happy”

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

My mom is currently blasting “They Don’t Know About Us” by One Direction while baking a pie. A glimpse into my future.

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

I gain a superiority complex when I wear spf. Like yes I have my life together and I am better than you, thank you.

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

My mom was on the phone talking about types of food rats get into and I thought she was talking about food that I like to eat bc she said, “They like rice, they love ramen noodles—BIG on ramen noodles! They really will snack on anything when they get hungry”

[Jess Bauer @jess_bauer3]

My dad watching Two and a Half Men on full volume and my mom blasting Meghan Trainor at the same time is my own personal hell.

[Hillary Clinton @HillaryClinton]

It delights me to think that what feels historical and amazing to us today—a woman sworn in to the vice presidency—will seem normal, obvious, "of course" to Kamala's grand-nieces as they grow up. And they will be right.