Jess Smith

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

@ATVIAssist @Activision Hi there, can I please get in contact with someone to help me get my Activision account back? Thank you.

[michaela okland @MichaelaOkla]

What if people simply pissed me off less

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

The slinky

[COLiN BURGESS @Colinoscopy]

made a Rube Goldberg machine

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

Can someone PLEASE cut my hair. Please. I am begging. I have lost all hope.

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

@mattdelia I work/live in Maine, just outside of Portland. I work at a grocery store so I’ve seen a lot of crazy things happen over the past month.

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

What are insane things you have seen people do in response to covid-19? Today I saw a lady take off her face mask, lick her finger, peel open a plastic produce bag, and then put her face mask back on.

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

Saw all of this after I listened to @mattdelia new podcast episode where he talks about how everyone should be wearing a mask. Ironic morning. Hopefully he reads this.

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

I also saw a girl walking around with a paper bag on her head. She cut out holes for her eyes, nose, and mouth. Also watched her stick her hand inside the bag to adjust it.

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

@kyribabe Ugh lucky I’m only getting 4 different group dms every day

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

The robot porn accounts on Instagram are really stepping up their dming game, huh?

[Chris D'Elia @chrisdelia]

Just doing my part to save lives during this pandemic.

[LISA CURRY @lisa_curry]

Everything’s gonna be fine April Fools!

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

My entertainment for today was watching my cat sleep.

[Nikki Glaser @NikkiGlaser]

Girlfriends of mine, if you are losing weight during this stressful time, please also lose my number.

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

Maybe don’t go get a coffee somewhere if this is how you’re going to react? I don’t know just a suggestion.

[Warren Sharp @SharpFootball]

No matter what happens next, let’s all agree to never be this dick

[Joey @JoeyMulinaro]

Hey dudes it’s never ok to wear flip flops but it’s definitely never ok to wear flip flops to the grocery during a pandemic

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

@ImTrulyClueless That’s some 💩

[Jess Smith @jessjsmith15]

CDC: no large groups!
Everyone: social distancing!
Businesses: everyone should be working from home to help prevent spreading germs!
Schools: closed
Middle aged idiots: what a great time to go raid the grocery store for the fourth time this week and also I’ll bring my kids!