John Dozer

I provide mild amusement at best. Everything I type on this account is complete nonsense.
No I am not your dad, sorry.

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

Me as a very realistic hamster at a club:

"Hey ladies, you know I can run that rim all night long ey?"

Doctor: "jesus christ"

My mother sobbing in the corner:

"It's been 17 years since the accident, why is he still like this"

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@iJixaw Literally me

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@lordmiles Apply for Verdis e resiency, for now it sounds like a meme but in two years it might be way more serious than anyone expected, especially with your support

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@GetFitWithJared @JustinWhang Respectfully, this is a very American perspective. I was born in soviet union and I knew about Hulk Hogan before I understood what pro wrestling is. When communism collapsed we got cable tv immediately and this is how I found WWF, wanting to see Hogan. He was the face of it all

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@DoxxxyStocksy What a flashback from the past, used to watch him a lot years ago. Very talented guy who had talent of mixing cinematic style with silly goofs and interesting reviews, really worth checking out

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

My response to the recent controversy - I am in fact an ally and I support the current thing.
Hamas for trans rights!
Make Islam Gay Again
That's what's up my MIGA

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@JustinWhang You just reminded me of my childhood, what a flashback of forgotten era, this title was huge in Poland, few people had computers but everyone knew Franko somehow

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

Hey @DanhausenAD I have a theory that secretly you are the new CEO of merchandise for WWE and you just pretend to be a wrestler. No need to confirm or deny but can you fix appalling merch of other wrestlers like Drew McIntyre for example. Human dollars are at stake, thanks

[Lord Miles @Lordmiles]

2ND OSAMA BIN LIGHTER GIVEAWAY. FREE!!!! 🚨🤯😵🫨

Like + retweet this post + comment.

Most LIKED ❤️ comment gets the lighter!!!

72 hours. No Indians or Israelis need apply!

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@lordmiles My dad never took me to Disneyland so I am here now. I am not even going to bother tagging him anymore.

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@iJixaw I can't breathe

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@iJixaw But when I call my banger tweets as "banger exes" people accuse me of yapping about my ex wife again

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

Again, a friend posts a photo of his newborn, I comment "wow that is incredible, congrats!"

Nobody knows that what I meant was that this is the most vile and disgusting creature I ever seen.

No lie, I was impressed but please don't ever do that again.

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

My wife left me and she took the fucking kids.

I mean sure, they weren’t technically MY kids but for fucks sake, they weren’t hers either!

She just grabbed some random kids on the street and left me.

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@iJixaw When will mom come back, you said she is on vacation, I don't like eating ramen anymore and all my clothes stink, dad wake up

[Count Dankula @CountDankulaTV]

He would neither go towards a job, nor return to the other protestors. Shortly afterwards, we saw him heading straight towards the ICE agent, some 70 feet away. His wifes boyfriend explained that even if he caught him and brought him back to the protestors, he would immediately head right back for the ICE agent. But why?

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@iJixaw i despawned a year ago and since then I am waiting in queue in the lobby

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@iJixaw Incredible things, I can confirm, this actually works

[Alex Jones @RealAlexJones]

@ISL_Paladins Retarded is the new based

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@iJixaw Give it to me instead, what could possibly go wrong

[John Dozer @JKilldozer]

@iJixaw Can't findo laowhai.. ancestors disappointed,,!