benson w. payne

[ClassicComics @ClassicComics3]

Devil Went Down to Georgia is fascinating to me because it’s so American. In any other culture it would be a cautionary tale of hubris and fooling with the demonic. But in America, Johnny actually is just better than the Devil. It’s so American

[a @aallleeexxxxxx1]

i am going to become completely sober from alcohol! but not all the time. like not if there’s something fun going on that night or if i feel like i need to have a drink

[Kim Severson @kimseverson]

Thank you Milwaukee airport for accurately naming that place right after you get through security.

[benson w. payne @joe_paschall]

@JackHummell Send a picture of it so we can see what you mean

[Simon Holland @simoncholland]

Even that little mid week stop to grab a few things but isn’t the main grocery shopping trip is costing $130.

[Jay Arnold @JayArnoldTX]

Taco Bell is the only fast food place I roll up to with no ordering game plan. I just let the menu speak to me. The Bell will tell me what I need. My mouth may be moving but I am just the instrument of a supreme design.

[Department of War 🇺🇸 @DeptofWar]

A night out.
@USMC Marines conduct a free-fall insertion during training over Marine Corps Auxiliary Landing Field Bogue, N.C.

[cory @coolmathgame_]

my halloween costume is going to be guy drinking beer… guy drinking several beers actually

[benson w. payne @joe_paschall]

@WillLooney5 @lilsamsquanch66 This is good work loon dog

[maybe: clare @clur19]

Went to a new doctor today and she asked if I smoke cigarettes and I said “only when I’ve been drinking a lot” and she deadass went “yeah we’ve all been there”

[Wøe ☥ @Woeotto]

Mfs be like “milk is nasty” then be 5’4

[jake @HoungSheldon]

“We’ve got over 50 beers on tap” oh wow very nice one Miller lite bottle please

[Eddy Burback @eddyburback]

my thanos snap would be to eliminate the concept of NFT’s I am so tired of hearing it from you nerds

[˗ˋˏ*̣̩⋆̩ 𝚍𝚎𝚕𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚎 ⋆̩*̣̩ˎˊ˗ @FrickinDelanie]

real

[pavlo @LaughterHaver]

if that’s your girl why is she answering my riddles three