Joe Fernandes

Buy or stream my album Impossible Human ⬇️

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

Check out our podcast
https://t.co/ART581R1b4

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

Everything is advertised with protein now. Chips. Ice cream. Fentanyl.

[𝐅𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐊𝐈𝐄 @FrankiesTwoLoud]

just a reminder

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

#NewProfilePic

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

I’m old enough to remember when Teslas were for Snowflakes.

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

The UnitedHealthcare CEO's murder has received so much coverage that he must be in-network.

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

At the urinal, a guy next to me let out a loud sigh of relief, looked my way, and said, 'Best part of the day!' I kept my focus and responded, 'You're making this the worst part of mine.'

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

https://t.co/ART581Qtlw

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

Our first episode has arrived! Thanks for subscribing and supporting! Link is in the comments. We appreciate you coming along on this ride and seeing what this project grows into. Email any weird stories or topics you would like us to cover at [email protected]
#podcast

[Uncle Vinnie’s Comedy Club @UNCLEVINNIESCC]

@joefernandes75 is back this month! Catch him on 10/24! Tickets available at https://t.co/gkTrNlR8Cc

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

The past two nights at @unclevinniescomedyclub were a lot of fun. I appreciate everyone that came out. I’ll be back August 14. Hope to see you back there to finish out the Summer. Bring your friends! 📸 by @emilypaigecomedy (I saw her taking it and totally sucked in my gut)

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

When your girl asks where you were last night. #debate

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

I keep expecting to hear, “Live from New York, Its Saturday Night!” #debate

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

#NewProfilePic

[McNeil @REFLOG18]

Still the best OJ Simpson line

Ken Griffey Jr’s reaction 💀😂

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

Just closed my Apple exercise ring chasing down a Mr. Softee truck 🍦

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

Not sure what the eclipse did to my eyes, but I feel way more attractive.

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

A buddy always wants to debate world politics until I remind him we met in remedial math in college, so we wrangle over the best burger joint instead.

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

@MikeGaffneyNOW @Rosenbergradio Inappropriate. Reported.

[Joe Fernandes @joefernandes75]

You are who your algorithm says you are. Apparently, I'm a man in need of a donut shop run by Dominican women with corgis.