Joff Brown

Does books.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

The best types of tea:

-The tea brought to you in bed on a Sunday morning
-The tea that comforts you after bad news, gives you the energy to carry on
-The leaning on the worktop after cleaning the kitchen tea (usually held in two hands)
-The “struggle to take a glove off as someone hands it to you” gardening break tea
-The tea you almost forget to drink when you’re in a rush but you remember it just in time
-The hotel room tea
-The tea with a cooked breakfast
-The recovering in hospital tea
-The tea on the freezing sidelines of a Sunday League football match
-The back at the desk after a long meeting tea
-The first tea of the day
-The first tea of the new year
-The tea you take to bed
-The tea while slapping a new coat of paint on the walls
-The tea in the shed
-The tea while staring out the window on a rainy Saturday afternoon
-The tea you celebrate with (and calm down with) when you’ve just received very good news
-The tea you didn’t expect to be offered
-The tea in a museum cafe
-The free tea
-The tea after an argument
-The tea that gives you an excuse to open the good biscuits
-The tea with a view
-The tea with buttered toast
-The “afternoon tea” with lots of little sandwiches and cakes
-The tea in a tent while camping
-The tea from a flask on an Autumn hike
-The tea while reading a book in an armchair on a rare day off with not a care in the world
-The tea after a hard day at work
-The tea after getting in from a run / bike ride
-The first tea back in your home after a holiday
-The picnic tea
-The ‘break up a long car journey’ tea
-The tea you make for someone and they say it’s a really lovely cup of tea, one of the best teas they’ve ever had
-The tea made by your Mum/Dad

[The Cultural Tutor @culturaltutor]

December In Art:

1. The Magpie by Claude Monet (1869)

[Joff Brown @JoffB]

@Microlambert Feels like a series of particularly cosy fantasy novels. "The saga went downhill after The Reassurance of Pasta when Sir Spatchcock finally killed the Lord High Chef with the Skewer of Destiny"

[Ned Hartley @NedHartley]

I used to keep falling through trapdoors in theatres but I don’t do that any more. It was just a stage I was going through.

[Joff Brown @JoffB]

@bennywebb I take that as a win! And I love the illustrations.

[Joff Brown @JoffB]

@bennywebb Omg! Hope you enjoy! Also don't tell me if not

[NHS Million @NHSMillion]

NHS staff are not failing, they are being failed, by successive Conservative Governments.

Please RT if you agree.

[Tristan S. Rapp @Hieraaetus]

THREAD - The Drowning of Doggerland

(1) Cities may be burnt & forgotten, distant islands lost & found. It is rare that an entire landmass is erased, only to be rediscovered millennia later.

This is the story of Europe's true Atlantis, of a Prehistoric world, lost to the sea.

[The Museum of Curiosities @CuriosMuseum]

Army of women confronting a force from the underworld, 17th C. print.

[Christopher Smets @CWSmets]

I think about this Tom Waits story all the time.

[Timothy Hucks (Commissions Open) @Ame0baRepublic]

At every corner of the human experience, it's the lie we just can't be kind. The stakes are too high, none of you understand the pressure of being Queen of the damned & we're too poor to have morality — it's all a fantasy.

Everyone gets to choose, & when we choose evil, it wins.

[Timothy Hucks (Commissions Open) @Ame0baRepublic]

Imagine, if you will, a man who pulls up to an empty plaza with a small moving van. He meticulously unloads pieces of wood, rope, & metal, one by one, not seeming to be in any great rush. The police greet him yet ask nothing, & when I do, he says that he's building a guillotine.

[Craig @ACasualBantam]

Went to do a job in Baildon this morning, and turned into one truly emotional roller coaster

Pulls up, bloke about 70 greets us, I look and think I recognise you, he speaks and I know the voice, but just can't place it at all

He wants observatory he is building waterproofed 1/?

[Ned Hartley @NedHartley]

I love working in London because every time you turn the corner you either see someone who is so incredibly happy that they are in this city that they want to explode, or someone who hates London so much it has corroded their very soul.

[David Roth @david_j_roth]

I wrote about how it's going on here, and tried to pin down whatever Twitter Blue Mindset is. https://t.co/1DiK0Zh1um