Jon Phillips

Ale, Whiskey & tea drinker. Biker, Irish road racing. Owns a Yamaha MT10 Land Rover n 2x Patterdale Terriers 🐾🐾

[Jon Phillips @jonphillips16]

It is what it is. #Atlantic #southwestengland

[Jon Phillips @jonphillips16]

@Ilovenostalgia Angels, Burnley.

[#Marcher @MarcherReborn]

#MarchersTopTips for a good night’s sleep in the #UKheatwave.

4-5 massive G&Ts/V&Ts, cold shower, 2-3 more drinks (fuck it, make it 5-6), wake up on the sofa tomorrow morning having had a good 8hrs kip.

Tune in tomorrow for further pearls of wisdom 👍

[WeGotitBack 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇬🇧🇺🇸 @NotFarLeftAtAll]

British humour

How did Jeremy Clarkson keep a straight face after that…

[Jon Phillips @jonphillips16]

@MarcherReborn Wendyball.

[Dave @millwall_david]

FUCKING HELL SARGE MILLWALL-WEST HAM NEXT SEASON #NOLUWDC #MIILLLLLLLL

[WeGotitBack 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇬🇧🇺🇸 @NotFarLeftAtAll]

How the hell… so many questions!!

[#Marcher @MarcherReborn]

😂😂😂😂

[Jon Phillips @jonphillips16]

@ClaretJD @Burnley133 He looks like Beaker off the Muppet Show 😆

[Mr PitBull Stories @MrPitbull07]

This morning, a 65 year-old man woke up in the early hours and heard thieves in his garage.

He called the police. Unfortunately, the officer on the phone told him they don't have any police officers free at the moment.

The guy hung up and then called again in a moment and tells the officer:
- it's about these thieves in my garage.
Don't bother coming anymore i’ve shot them.

After literally 2 minutes, 4 police cars, Armed response, counter terrorists, ambulances turned up,..... Thieves were obviously caught.

Police officers had a chat with the gentleman
Officer says - " You said you shot them! "
Gentlemen - " And you said you don't have a free police car "

Credit: Rudes On a roll

[Bank of Dave OBE @FishwickDavid]

I'm flying over Burnley, & the Warburtons factory & trucks are on Fire! The fire engines have just arrived! Let me know if you need anybody airlifted to the hospital! @LancsPolice & @LancashireFRS my helicopter can carry 5 & I'm available to help immediately!
Hope everyone is safe.

[Jon Phillips @jonphillips16]

@MarcherReborn

[Jon Phillips @jonphillips16]

@ClaretJD @SkySportsPL Teasdale out.

[Don Keith @RealDonKeith]

SNL’s George Fouracres does a hilarious Keir Starmer impression on SNL and it’s spot on.

[BELTS @SaintBelta]

🤣

[Lee Hurst @LeeHurstComic]

What a stroke of luck.

[Jon Phillips @jonphillips16]

@MarcherReborn Nurse!!! Nurse!!!

[Spaceballs The X Account @Grunt2A]

Now that Artemis II has launched we have 10 days to get everyone on Earth a Planet of the Apes costume so we can do something hilarious when the astronauts return 😁

[PAW (Peter) @Peter88902568]

Ed Miliband Watching a Wind Turbine Mince a Falcon, 2026 (colourised).

[Jon Phillips @jonphillips16]

@MarcherReborn 135 sheets for a nylon shirt 😆😆