jordan

twitter is a place

[jordan @jordan_mort]

last night i drunk texted heinz

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@BritishGasHelp hi i’ve just sent you a dm 🙏 please reply asap

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@newm00npixie how did this go

[jordan @jordan_mort]

why when people are enjoying football, does there always have to be people like “i’m guessing the football has started? i’m not interested in grown men kicking a bag of air around 🤓” like ok just say you’re a virgin and go

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@newm00npixie yeah i wish i had something to smile about too brian

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@LiamTheGoodman it’s all of em but it slaps so enjoy it

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@Myprotein @splitit #MyproteinBasket please i need this

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@newm00npixie into 🤩 the 🥴 thick 😩 of 💃🏻 it 💫

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@newm00npixie w h a t

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@LiamTheGoodman scissors supremacy

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@TheEmeraldJaco1 @ManMilk2 it’s not even referencing among us tho, it’s referencing “there’s a fungus among us”

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@newm00npixie fuck yeah i’d call that a win

[jordan @jordan_mort]

NAH BRO WHEN I WAS 6 I WROTE “PETER AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY”
did we all really live the same life???

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@newm00npixie yeah but then you’ll never find out how much more than you he knows about fossils??? ur loss sweaty

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@newm00npixie like bro you’re going that way anyway just pretend i’m not here

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@LiamTheGoodman i will commit war crimes if i ever have to use blackboard collaborate again

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@LiamTheGoodman mate we need to get together and watch it with some drinks

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@newm00npixie @LiamTheGoodman i just rlly couldve used a miss honey when i was a kid

[jordan @jordan_mort]

@LiamTheGoodman m a t i l d a

[jordan @jordan_mort]

people can save planets or them. wreck that’s the choice. be best of the humanity

[Doctor Who @bbcdoctorwho]

The Doctor's words of wisdom for #EarthDay