jaypee

like you care....

[jaypee @jpreyer]

@catherinehyeo I have PTSD from that damn book....

[jaypee @jpreyer]

@RKalland Literally opened this app just to look for this!

[mr_eggs @scrumble_eggs]

This robot is coming for your job (being drunk in a public park at 2 in the afternoon)

[jaypee @jpreyer]

@ZachKleinWSB All of them.

[H2 @ShortParFore]

I can give you this shot with any club in the bag

[Cousin Sal @TheCousinSal]

I’ve never witnessed a murder but I imagine it would look something like this.

[james hawkins @james406]

110-year-old Turkish grandma shares her secret to a long life:

"i never once used Microsoft Teams"

[Mitch Goldich 🐙 @mitchgoldich]

The biggest game of the first round is on Friday, when Long Island battles Arizona for iced tea supremacy

[Count Dankula @CountDankulaTV]

The Afroman Trial.

-Cops raid Afromans house for bullshit reasons.
-Steal money, break his door, fuck his house up.
-No criminality found whatsoever, no charges at all pressed on Afroman.
-Afroman spends the next 3 years making songs that make fun of all the officers involved by name, even using footage of the raid from his own CCTV cameras.
-Songs had titles like "Randy Walters is a son of a bitch" and "Lick Em Low Lisa" accusing one of the officers of being a lesbian and sleeping with the other officers wives.
-During the raid one officer looked like he was about to eat some lemon pound cake sitting on Afromans counter, Afroman made a whole album calling the officer fat.
-The cops get mad and file a lawsuit for defamation.
-Afroman turns up to court in a whole American flag suit.
-Officers performatively mald and cry while listening to the songs really trying to oversell how badly the songs upset them.
-One officer was suing because Afroman made a whole song about him saying he was fucking the officers wife. When the officer was asked if Afroman was really fucking his wife, he said "I don't know". Nuking his own case and establishing that there is a non-zero chance that Afroman might actually be fucking his wife.
-As his only witness for the trial, Afroman brought a deputies EX FUCKING WIFE.
-The jury ruled completely in favour of Afroman.

This entire thing has been a great win for free speech and absolutely fucking hilarious.

[Tom Fornelli @TomFornelli]

Be the white horse today.

[Steve Holman @RealVoiceofHawk]

Worst day in Atlanta sports history. I still feel it in the pit of my stomach.

[jaypee @jpreyer]

One of my favorite roles from one of my favorite actors. RIP....

[Frolic King @frolickking]

@jemelehill “You heard the one about the two bulls?”

[jaypee @jpreyer]

@BIODAWGSPORTBOI This game is making me angry.

[Jack @Crack3rjax19]

Matt Ryan walked into that front office and immediately said

[Liam Nissan™ @theliamnissan]

Fun Fact: If Maduro was in the Epstein files he'd be safe at home in his bed right now

[jaypee @jpreyer]

Oh Jesus Falcons, what are you doing?

[jaypee @jpreyer]

@kelseytsutton How did Carolina shut out this team?

[jaypee @jpreyer]

@jontweetssports Real talk, if they created 5 more bowl ganes I wouldn’t blink. Freaking love this time of year.

[jaypee @jpreyer]

@jontweetssports Dad joke master!