Julia Armstrong

Proud Buckeye, collaborative, get it done!
Exec. Director, Institute for Cybersecurity and Digital Trust @ The Ohio State University

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

As a musician and as a hardware engineer, I appreciate this 😂

[bubble boi @bubbleboi]

"Show me the critical path."

"Uh, right here. It’s the multiplier it’s failing setup by 1.2 nanoseconds at 600 megahertz."

"A nanosecond and a half. An eternity. You’re missing the clock edge by a fucking eternity?"

"Well, the synthesizer isn’t packing the DSP slices efficiently, and the routing delay to the accumulator is—"

"Stop.

Do not blame the tools. The tool is a hammer. You are the carpenter. If the table wobbles, you don’t blame the hammer. You blame the incompetent carpenter who doesn't know how to drive a nail. Pull up the RTL... now.
Scroll down to the accumulator block. Line 450... read it to me, what does it say?"

"Ugh... always @(posedge clk) begin if (reset) acc <= 0; else acc <= acc + mult_result; end"

"Do you see it?"

"...See what?"

"He doesn’t see it. The grad student from MIT. He looks at a block of sequential logic and he doesn’t see the cancer he just planted in my silicon. Where is the pipeline stage for mult_result before it hits the adder?"

"Oh. I… I didn’t think I needed one there. The simulation showed the data arriving in time."

"Yes because the simulation is fucking Mario Kart. It’s a fantasy land where physics is a suggestion and wire delay doesn’t exist. We are building fucking hardware. The electrons move through copper traces at a fraction of the speed of light. Do you understand the difference between a video game and reality?"

"Ugh...Yes, Mr. Bubble. I just thought the logic depth wasn't that—"

"THE LOGIC DEPTH IS TWENTY-FOUR GATES DEEP!"

"You have a 32-bit multiplier feeding directly into a 64-bit adder in a single clock cycle at 600 megahertz! What do you think happens to the propagation delay? Do you think the electrons just teleport because you wrote a pretty line of code?"

"I—I can add a register."

"Where? Where do you add it? Show me on the floor plan." Look at this shit. It looks like a plate of spaghetti thrown against a wall by a toddler. You're starving the chip. Are you lazy? Or are you just stupid?"

"I’m not… I was trying to optimize for latency."

"You are burning resources like they’re free. You’re at 85% LUT utilization because you’re coding hardware like a Python script kiddie. Now erase the multiplier module."

"What?"

"Delete it. The whole file."

"But… that’s three weeks of work."

"It’s three weeks of garbage. Delete it."

"Now. You are going to rewrite it. You are going to manually instantiate the DSP48 primitives. No inference. You are going to pipeline it three stages deep. And you are going to floorplan those slices right next to the Block RAMs. Now start typing dickhead....

And if I see another timing violation you won't just be off this project. I will make sure the only digital design you ever do again is programming the microwave at Wendy's."

*door slams*

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

@AccidentalCISO My husband has stove envy

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Did y'all know @AccidentalCISO is also a talented baker? Pulled out his pumpkin pie recipe, got the kids to help, and we can't wait to eat this tomorrow!

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

@AccidentalCISO While frustration is the immediate reflex reaction, then it was soon known that it wasn't an individual experience. Hence, faculty MUST allow for the technical difficulties and EXTEND deadlines. Ooooh aaaaaah

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

@AccidentalCISO

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

@AccidentalCISO These replies are

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Where have I been this week?
Learning tons about our government agencies and cyber workforce development for federal agencies. I'm excited, confident and eager to start implementing promising new plans!

https://t.co/ua2b9u6tl8

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Big 2025 announcement #1!

NSF Awards $15 Million To Four Universities For Cybersecurity Programs via @forbes https://t.co/z4MhKWb4MI

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Exciting things are on the horizon....
#2025

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

You have about week left to get in on this online bootcamp! #GSEC

[Institute for Cybersecurity & Digital Trust @icdtosu]

Interested in learning about cryptography, threat detection and system security? The Cyber x400 Online GIAC Security Essentials prep course starts Dec 2., and there's a 60% discount if you sign up this month! https://t.co/SIhlC2Y4wR

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Looking for more info on this one...

Parents seek transparency as Marysville resumes classes after cybersecurity incident https://t.co/eQak12RvOt

[Institute for Cybersecurity & Digital Trust @icdtosu]

We are looking for speakers for the Annual
ICDT Industry Symposium on Tues, October 22. 
This year's theme-- Disinformation as Cybersecurity Threat and Eroding Trust.

Submission form closes September 30.
Apply here: https://t.co/yzchdIZR7i

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

For my troubles... Yes, you'll have to pick up your suitcase for the overnight layover. Nope. You cannot get your luggage until your final destination.

Thanks. 😒

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Made it as far as Denver... Very much late. And then got stuck on the tarmak in a lightning storm. Still here. Maybe I'll make it to Idaho tomorrow?? 😓

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Heading to @INL for University Days. Looking forward to meeting good people and learning more about their advances in cybersecurity!

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Alina from @FisherOSU and I representing @ohiostate at @WiCySorg #WiCyS2024 @icdtosu #seeherasequal

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

I'm on my way to Nashville!

[Lynn Dohm | WiCyS ♥️ @lynn_dohm]

Over 220 women and ally leaders in a leadership symposium at @WiCySorg conference… kicking off #wicys2024

[Julia Armstrong @juli1102]

Way to go, Charlene! ❤️ We've known you're someone special for a long time ❤️

[STEAM Factory at Ohio State University @theSTEAMfactory]

We have a very exciting announcement - Charlene Brenner has been awarded the Ohio State University Distinguished Staff Award! She was surprised with the notification of her award during a meeting with STEAM Factory leadership.

[Institute for Cybersecurity & Digital Trust @icdtosu]

Our annual Research Forum is tomorrow from 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. in Pomerene Hall. To learn more and register, click on the link below!
https://t.co/JoBS9EJN1j