Julius Scissor

God Speed

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@mosess_09 I fell in love three times in 2 months 😅😅😅

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@KK_Mbogo_ @Okwaro_ @mosess_09 @kevin_jomo @Winwinhere_ @vardieeeee @O_Brayan_ @2xxjonathan @Grandson7Okwara @EvansOmukubaKE @Lm_matoke @frenchmufasa 😅😅😅 aaaaaaaaaaah

[Citizen TV Kenya @citizentvkenya]

Barnabas Owuor, Analyst – Diplomacy, Intelligence & Security: Civic education has changed. The next election is in 2027 and I think people have learned that civic duty does not end at the ballot box and they are going to scrutinize the government and different projects #CitizenWeekend @OBurrows

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@KokPapi Aaaaaaaaaaah 😂😂😂

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

Immaterial

[Karani @Weyne_west]

Bila kunishow job we hufanya, niambie vitu we husema 50 times per day. 😆

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@mosess_09 Mimi hutanianika Bois 😅😂

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@mosess_09 Sungura alipokosa mzabibu alisema ni machungu 🥲😅😅

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@Dollar__SM Hi-wezekani

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@mosess_09 Samsung Galaxy S10 ultra 😅😅

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@mosess_09 Wewe ndio kiongozi wetu hii pande 😂😂😂

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

Waweke category ya mafia 🥺 😅😅😅 @mosess_09

[Pocket Rocket🚀 @ronnie_omondi]

Good Morning @ImpalaRfc
Shoka ililand jana😂..please wekeni hio flash sale tena leo, we thought we'd make the #Floodies squad. Makosa ni yetu😂

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

Aaaaah 😂😂🤣 hii imenimess

[Thirsty Kipsoiwet 🇰🇪 🇳🇱 @Makiadi_]

The easiest “Sugar Mummies” to brainwash ni wale miaka imeenda, but kwa akili zao, wao hujiona bado ni Gen Z.

You will see them on social media, especially on TikTok, dancing in those short dresses ni kama ni teenagers wameingia adolescence, and updating their fans on their gym progress while wearing tight Gym catsuit and sweating profusely after a workout session.

Instead of abusing them in the comments like everyone else does for refusing to “move on” and to accept harsh realities, kama Kijana bado anatafuta, lie low and “cash out” maximumly!

In your first meeting at those clubs in Uptown which play country music and AI songs in the background at low volume, the first question she will ask you after a few drinks ni, “Ukiniona hivi, nakaa miaka ngapi hivi?”

Now, that’s a tricky question, and it’s a do-or-die for these “cabal” of wealthy women. So, usiseme kitu kama 22 ama 23 years. Surely, my brother, ata Shetani atajua unadanganya!

So, weka figure reasonable and before giving your final “poll results,” hold her hand, inspect her palms ni kama unataka kumsomea nyota, check her face keenly, then sema kitu kama, “I’m 100% sure uko 28, na in your next birthday utaingia 29.”

She will laugh whole heartedly, slap your lap, then akuitishie shot ingine ya Don Julio na Chumbi and reply, “OMG! You are so wrong! Kuja juu kidogo!”

My brother, at that point, umetolewa kwa kichaka ya group stages na ukaingizwa semi-finals direct!

Play with the figures as you push one year ahead, na akurudishie in that romantic back-and-forth. But let me warn you: ikifika 34 years, refuse everything and ask for supporting documents.

Of course, from ngozi ya shingo yake, you can tell clearly ako on the “climbing lane,” ya maisha but kuongea ukweli imewahi saidia nani?

Bladifaken!

Be in denial and say something like, “Eunice, hakuna haja ya kudanganyana. Leta ID ama passport tu-confirm, kweraaaa!”

She will give you a warm hug, then akuambie you give her time kidogo, and she will rush to the parking lot, aingie her Lexus RX 350, na atoe passport kwa ile glove compartment matajiri huficha pistol.

At that point, andika kwa WhatsApp group ya your extended family, umepata kazi kubwa Nairobi waache kuomba!

She will return and show you her passport, stamped on nearly all pages, another testament that she is well-travelled and has widened her gap between the haves and the have-nots.

She will hide her bio page and give you one last chance to guess her age. But, as I advised, stick to, “Kama imepita 34 years, then mimi sijui! Aki ya Mungu!”

She will finally reveal it, na utaona kweli Eunice was born in 1976, so ako around 50 years.

Wake up from your seat, then shout, even attracting revelers nearby, and wail, “THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE! How? Gadeeeeeem!”

She will beg you to calm down, then ask her openly what the secret is, and she will say, “Hydrating, exercising, eating the right food, and minding my damn business!”

From then on, utakuwa umeingia top secretariat yake, na ni kama umeingizwa butchery na kisu sharp; ni wewe kuamua ni nyama kiasi gani unataka kukata!

Shauri yenu!

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

*mud but still 😂😂

[Moses Keragori 🇰🇪 @mosess_09]

What do we have here 🤣🤣
@frenchmufasa in the mad

[Eniola Dada @theenioladada]

Not touching the relationship too much. Hear me out.

I think people sometimes ruin good relationships by trying too hard to make them work. Every little disagreement becomes a crisis, every change in mood becomes a sign that something is wrong, and every phase of the relationship needs to be analysed. They are too into the relationship that they forget themselves.

Sometimes, you just need to let things be.

Let your partner be a person, not a project. Let them have bad days without assuming they have stopped loving you. Let the relationship breathe without constantly demanding reassurance that everything is okay.

Not every argument needs to be won. Not every disagreement needs to become a three-hour conversation. Not everything needs to be corrected. And not every difficult season means you're with the wrong person.

Of course, this doesn't mean tolerating disrespect, ignoring problems, or avoiding difficult conversations. Some things need to be addressed and some boundaries need to be enforced.

But there's a difference between nurturing a relationship and constantly interfering with it.

It's fine to love someone deeply, communicate, make compromises, apologise when you're wrong. Put in the work. But also learn when to leave things alone.

Sometimes, the secret to a long-term relationship is knowing that not everything needs your immediate attention.

Give the relationship room to grow. Give each other room to breathe. Stop trying to control every outcome.

Some things get better when you stop touching them so much. Just let it be

[Eric @amerix]

Bois,

Life is hard.

Jitume.

Toka kwa nyumba ya mama.

Get out and go fight the battles.

Go out there, opportunities won't come to you- go for them.

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@DenverKulecho Aaah wewe ni wetu wa Kinoo Muthiga Regen

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@mosess_09 Banter delayed is not banter denied

[Julius Scissor @julioscissors]

@mlunje_sheeso 😂😂😂 Mimi mkipata yangu si mtanichapa