Kateless Smith

She died doing what she loved: Saying, 'You're killing me, Smalls.'

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

Free pick-up line: Damn girl, are you the eroding joint cartilage that leads to osteoarthritis? Because you've got me weak in the knees.

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

Don't talk to me until my cat learns how to drink coffee.

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

My dress is fitting me so much like a glove I'm worried it's going to get OJ off again for killing his wife.

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

We get it now, Leslie.

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

My date just knocked my water glass off the table & it's like: I thought the point of online dating was to meet people other than my cat?

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

Can you handle me at my hard taco?

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

Say you'll remember me, standing in a nice dress, for once not being pantless.

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

How the fuck do you spell cultural appropriation?! Kultural? lol

[rob fee @robfee]

I wonder if Superman ever put glasses on Lois Lane's dog & she was like, "I've never seen this dog before. Is this a new dog?"

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

Johnny Depp wants to go back to being Cinderella—a young girl in a bad situation that’s never treated like a human, and not be Quasimodo—the classic symbol in a tale as old us time about how the ugly monsters we fear the most are probably harboring beautiful hearts of gold.

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

3:14 thoughts: Sour is pretty fucking incredible album 🎵

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

Keep whisper-singing "Let me love you like a woman, let me hold you like a baby" with perfect bravado to my unsuspecting cat, but nope, he's still an unwilling participant at best. Moody, but because he's struggling to get out of my arms. #ChemTrailsOverTheCountryClub

[Kateless Smith @kate_smithxx]

Coach Bombay--not Charlie--was my first movie crush as a child. (Wendy Peffercorn my second.) Say what you will but Emilio Estevez has still got it going on 🔥

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

stairs are ridiculous. you cannot just change the ground. who do you think you are

[Alex Goldschmidt @alexandergold]

folklore and evermore

[rob sheffield @robsheff]

she’s so ahead of the sphere, the sphere just became a hyperbolic paraboloid

[Fred Delicious 🍆 @Fred_Delicious]

can't believe they're finding ballot papers in US states that had an election yesterday. that's the last place you'd expect them to be

[Greta Thunberg @GretaThunberg]

So ridiculous. Donald must work on his Anger Management problem, then go to a good old fashioned movie with a friend! Chill Donald, Chill!

[Zack Hunt @ZaackHunt]

The most widespread example of voter fraud in America is Christians voting for Donald Trump in the name of Jesus.