I may criticize Malema daily on this timeline for his Pan Africanism stance, but the truth is ...his voice is necessary in South African politics. Very important
Someone said: the prettier and more intelligent a woman is, the uglier the rumors a narcissist will spread about her. A narcissist does not spread the worst lies about a woman who means nothing; they do it to the woman whose presence exposes them, threatens, and makes them feel small. Beauty gets attention. Intelligence gets respect.
And when a woman carries both,a narcissist feels deeply overshadowed by her existence.they know they cannot easily dominate her through truth, so they try to poison how other people see her. If she is beautiful,they will try to make her look dirty.if she is intelligent,they will try to make her look unstable. If she is confident, they will try to make her look arrogant. If she is kind, they will try to make her look manipulative.
They attack the exact quality that gives her value because they cannot tolerate the idea that people may see in her something they can never manufacture in themselves.They may not be able to take away her face, her mind, presence or her natural impact, but they will try to attach shame to it. They will try to make her beauty look suspicious,her intelligence dangerous, and her strength look unlikable.Why?
Because if they cannot own her,they want to contaminate how she is perceived. And that is what survivors need to understand.
SABOTAGING someone’s PROFESSIONAL CAREER so that it becomes IMPOSSIBLE for them to receive a JOB in their actual field of work because you wanted to CONTROL the NARRATIVE is DIABOLICAL.
Let other kids eat too. The sun shines for everyone. Uplifting someone never stops you from growing. Jealousy is evil. When they shine you shine too. Share the stage. Stop this gatekeeping nonsense and rotate talent and opportunities with same faces. In the US in less than 24hrs I had access to Taylor Swift event and Maroon 5. In mzansi you discover things after the events coz of gatekeepers. Someone knows a sponsorship and a job opening but they won't tell you umona.
Gatekeeping is modern-day witchcraft in Mzansi. Keeping opportunities away from the deserving just to prevent them from outgrowing you is toxic. The industry stays the same because "witches" prioritize friends over talent. It’s time to stop hiding the keys. 🗝️🚫
If am lying prove me wrong.
I remember an older woman saying something similar at a family gathering once. Everyone laughed when she said it, but the older people nodded in quiet agreement, the kind that comes from experience, not bitterness.
She explained that rejection rarely arrives loudly the first time. It comes subtly. Delayed replies that were once instant. Effort that suddenly feels forced. Plans that always depend on convenience. Affection that becomes inconsistent. You start explaining away behavior because you remember who they used to be.
And that’s where many people lose themselves.
Because love has a way of making us negotiate with reality. We convince ourselves they’re busy, stressed, confused, or going through something temporary. We give extra chances, extra understanding, extra patience hoping effort will restore interest.
But interest rarely needs persuasion.
Someone who truly wants you makes room for you naturally. They communicate. They show up. They protect the connection instead of leaving you guessing where you stand.
The wisdom behind that grandmother’s advice wasn’t pride or ego, it was self preservation.
The first time someone shows disinterest is information.
The second time becomes permission.
When you ignore clear signals, you slowly begin to abandon your own dignity just to maintain proximity to someone uncertain about you.
Maturity is recognizing that love should not require constant convincing. You shouldn’t have to audition for commitment or compete for basic attention.
Walking away after clarity isn’t losing someone, it’s refusing to lose yourself.
Because the right person doesn’t leave you analyzing silence or decoding mixed signals. They make their presence unmistakable.
And sometimes self respect simply means believing people the first time they show you where you truly stand.
Who else in this weird stage in their life? Drinking isn't fun anymore, relationships don’t work, dating doesn’t exist, work is just a distraction, and friday nights are better spent alone.