Kelly Contressa

[Kelly Contressa @kell_fitz]

when Jimmy Kimmel donate's to your Aunt's fight with cancer... I have no words https://t.co/jG4DfXkRkb

[Alex @alexxmalloy]

if the knicks win tonight we will see the statue of liberty being carried down 8th ave

[aj 🧷 @ajjordanphoto]

saying “and also with you” to everyone who says “knicks in five” today

[𝓓𝓸𝓬_𝔃𝓮𝓮 ✧ @doc_zee7]

Me refusing to sleep because i didn't get enough time to feel like human after work

[trash jones @jzux]

i’m actually stealing AI’s job (wasting resources and making up stupid shit)

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

Not emotionally prepared to log back onto the darkest corners of the internet tomorrow (Teams, Outlook, and Excel).

[Mira Gonzalez @miragonz]

how do i become as lobotomized as amanda batula

[nikita @poohthebear0]

not a single nonchalant bone in my body, I see the sky change color and I’m jumping like a fool

[bunny sanders @whatbunnysaid]

Imagine not being a Bravo fan

[Black Girl @t_sadiity]

this tuesday feels forced. we should've had today off as well

[claire de lune @ClaireMPLS]

i’m just gonna say it: some of yall aren’t qualified for self checkout. if you don’t have an internal sense of urgency and fine motor skills, leave it to the professionals cause the rest of us are trying to keep it pushin

[Jordanreviewsittt @jordanreviewsit]

“As a gift from management, you can leave 5 minutes early today to get a head start on your holiday weekend if you’re all caught up on work”

[bailey @Baileymoon15]

i was put on earth to go out to dinner

[fluttershy @hwrtyed]

from a young age i knew everybody was wrong and i was right

[Debbie Downer @ANGELBABYBITTY]

Do u wanna come over and lay in bed like the grandparents from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

[Debbie Downer @ANGELBABYBITTY]

Sundays are for taking 42 steps all day

[airi 𝜗℘ @4irellee]

beach rotting instead of bed rotting

[I'm @DEEHOLY_FATHER]

really passionate about warm lighting. turn off that scary ceiling light!

[S.🎧 @1ssve]

Can't believe it’s already May. Time flies when you work everyday of your fucking life

[Softboy☄️ @softboywin]

well this weekend lasted a good 5 minutes

[S.🎧 @1ssve]

My love language? Ignoring Teams messages after 2pm on Friday