baby k

will absolutely kick your ass

[Andrew Hilary🇵🇸 @AndrewHilaryUS]

You’re either smoking a cig with me or you’re smoking a cig against me

[tea stoner 📚 91/95 @bookbeduion]

Sadly true

[Lauren Lavín @lalavin666]

I'd really only want knuckle tattoos that reflect a philosophy I can stand behind 100%. Something like OKAY SURE

[m🇵🇸 @crosbysstar]

costume idea: dressing up as a referee and yelling ‘too many men!’ everywhere you go

[Noah Stalgia @Noahstalgia]

People who choose to run marathons are always functional alcoholics and have done something in the recent past that haunts them every night as they try to fall asleep.

[k ⁶³ ³⁰ 🪽 @grkaivyna]

🚨BREAKING

George Russell to race on FOOT in the race tomorrow.

“We zont want to fix ze car” says Toto Wolff. “We watch teletubbies instead”

[zero.com @sewiscidal]

i love watching formula one because no matter how bad my day is george russell is having a worse one

[⋆˚꩜｡n0ty0urdad ⋆‧°𓏲ּ𝄢 @cherrybomb3r1]

Call it being 26 but I just can’t be bothered with certain behaviors like I gotta figure out my insurance rn idgaf that you don’t text

[ً @artfuIchaos]

I am simultaneously my family’s black sheep and the gold star, that’s exactly why I am the way I am

[KITTY GIRL! @Raatma666]

genuinely how i find my cats when i hear loud thuds in the middle of the night

[zen @zentwo0]

We need a “Take Your Friend to Work Day.” I want to see what y’all actually do and meet the people from all the stories

[dev! 🌈 @diamondthrone]

You are not a cereal bro you're going to the vet

[kelsie @iPad_Latino]

Someone please take him

[Andrew Hilary🇵🇸 @AndrewHilaryUS]

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

[erin ! @lilerinb]

turned 26 and now i'm watching shit like the sopranos and sex and the city

[Lesbian Rod Serling 🇵🇸🇺🇦🇮🇷 @LRSerling]

The older i get the more i start to hold "talking about calories at all" as something i just wont tolerate

[daisy “dan goose” tackett @fatstevebuscemi]

Ikea, 11:02am. doors not yet opened. guy next to me says “so we don’t care about RULES? what’s next? LAWS?”

[Heidi Klum’s worm face @w0rm_face]

My uncle died last night. Went in for surgery on his heart stint but he didn’t look good so my cousin said “pull the plug.” An hour later he sat up, signed himself out, went to the bar with his friends, got plastered then DIED. True Midwestern Irish Man died doing what he loved.

[ONE BILLION DRACULAS @emwheezie]

The man with the pee pee paws

[big dog you are mother i mean they @finelylesberg]

both losing and gaining weight suck because you have to buy new pants which is the worst thing that can happen to a person