Kane Kardashian

The Van Gogh of Twitter. ✊🏼✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿🏳️‍🌈 (He/They)

Find all my tweets at the link below:

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

only 490BC kids remember

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

Dracula: *drinking blood* first i kill you

Me: omg yes

Dracula: then you live again... forever

Me: omg no

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

Woman: *smiles politely*

Men: ok so what are we

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

Wookiees don't smoke, they just chewbacco

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

in this joke i am being too loud in the library then someone is like "read the room" and then I'm like "lol that'll take forever"

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

My mum caught me looking at adult content again

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

Poseidon Pofronton

[Noah Garfinkel @NoahGarfinkel]

“Let me get this straight, you got your asses kicked by four fully mature mutant ninja turtles?”

“No, sir, it’s actually worse than that.”

[Sneezy Dennis @SneezyDennis]

in the twitter community they call it a dump tweet, you post it before something good to take the pressure off

[Sneezy Dennis @SneezyDennis]

achoo

[Hugo Rifkind @hugorifkind]

Remarkable to hear Braverman say multiculturalism has failed. She's a British Home Secretary descended from Goan Indians from Mauritius and Kenya, married to a Jewish husband, in a government headed by Britain's first Hindu PM. What would successful multiculturalism look like?

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

My favourite Mario character is Alec Guigi

[Danny @abnersquill]

@zachsilberberg He's like Paul Dano for swifties

[The State of LinkedIn @StateOfLinkedIn]

Imagine this actually being a thing

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

@PsycheEros13

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

New year, new me.

I slowly melt away as my clone takes my place. He puts on my clothes and picks up my things. He gently cries to himself.

"This one is sad too" sighs The Professor. "We'll try again next year"

[Kane Kardashian @KWalps]

@PsycheEros13

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

hogwarts legacy has introduced a new jewish bisexual character named dreidel bothways

[Shae Reloaded @judgementshae]

you're telling me most people remember their childhoods? it's not normal to have occasional single memories with years of nothing and a general feeling of unease?

[Stone @StoneAgeRadio13]

I’m 48 years old and the idea of dating a 19 year old model is just exhausting.

[soul nate @MNateShyamalan]

not to be overly dramatic but it’s so fucked up that there are people alive who had to get around by reading maps. insanely fucked up way to live. i would simply stand perfectly still forever