Kyle Stevens

Musician | Dad | DJ. Nerds call me #nerdrock artist Kirby Krackle. Your grandma calls me sweetie-peach.

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

Baby food is just as good as I remember.

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

I love me some @GreggSchigiel, and that is a fact.

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

*stretches from last tweet in December of 2019*

Just woke up from a nap...did I miss anything?

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

Would You Rather...Live ON a ranch or live IN ranch?

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

When the crib smells like a nursing home, you know that menu is on point.

Happy Twerksgiving, fam!

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

“You have an interesting accent, what am I hearing?”

“Uhhhhh mid-90’s Seattle Public School system?”

Is this a thing?

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

@Galumbits Share with us, your worldly wisdom?

[Chris Barron @thechrisbarron]

My stepmom told me I’d be a janitor [nothing wrong with that] and live in the basement of a school and play guitar for the rats.

I wrote a song about her. It’s called Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong.

It’s been played on the radio three million times.

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

Cheering in my car from the ferry line!

[Lewis Vaughan Jones @LVaughanJones]

When your drone runs out of battery over a lake, timing is everything...

https://t.co/btDekWXpoV

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

Shout out to the guy who kept coming up to me during the wedding I DJ’d last night continually asking for Sean Kingston’s “Beautiful Girls” while simultaneously crop-dusting my booth every time.

“Dude, I’m trying to help you do your job better!”

Dude, eat an apple?

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

@ronmarz The level of anger I feel towards these people is something I’ve never felt before.

I’m praying for a reckoning of the likes of which the world has never seen, but I honestly have no idea where it’s going to come from.

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

@DaddyVCoughlin Dude, that is awesome you did that! To be honest, I don’t have the tabs right now but I can always send you a video of how to play it if you like. Please shoot me a reminder on our official website and I will get that back to you when I come back from tour!

[Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien]

Shark Tank idea: a microwave that will self-destruct if someone tries to use it to cook fish.

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

Works for me, often.

[Maximum Derek @CapSteveRogers]

If you're agonizing between which two shirts to wear, try dripping toothpaste down the front of one of them, thus immediately limiting your choice.

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

When was the last time you @DonaldJTrumpJr’d yourself, you know, like as an adult?

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

@ryansaavedra I think what you mean she’s one of the few with the brass tell the truth, and you guys are scared shitless.

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

Yep!

Also, now add 3-weeks of forest fire haze just to keep things spicy (smoky)

[Emily Heller @MrEmilyHeller]

If you're pro-life you should be fighting climate change, not abortion. If you're pro-life you should be fighting climate change, not abortion. If you're pro-life you should be fighting climate change, not abortion. If you're pro-life you should be fighting climate change, not ab

[Kyle Stevens @kylestevens]

Beyond.

[Mark @MarkSchweitzer]

Calling Donald Trump a “businessman” is like calling Dr. Pepper a “cardiologist”.