life pro tip: one time someone said my own joke louder than me and everyone laughed but as my act of revenge i started saying the joke was kind of problematic n everyone started agreeing and turned on the joke thief
Deer population is controlled by releasing wolves into an area. All problems should be solved that way. Too much pollution? Release wolves in factories. Dislike Congress? Wolves. Wanna lose weight? That's right, wolves.
one time in middle school i dated a girl for 4 days and when she broke up with me she posted on facebook “sometimes your knight in shining armor is really just a loser in tinfoil” and to this day that the sickest burn i’ve ever gotten
ME: In the Middle Ages people would sometimes mix stale urine with wood ash to wash and whiten their clothes. From this repulsive confluence of waste products, something pure is brought about. Just like love.
Priest: the bride has also chosen to write her own vows.