SheBangs

If we couldn’t laugh, we would all go insane -Jimmy Buffett

[SheBangs @leabangs]

My days basically now revolve around trying to avoid toddler temper tantrums. And failing miserably. Over and over, and over again.

[SheBangs @leabangs]

Many things were on my evening to-do list. None of them included cleaning my child's poop off her piggy bank she carries around like a stuffie. And yet, here we are...

[Liz Joy @LizLemeryJoy]

I’m calling on all of Congress Repubs/Dems alike to cut their salaries by 35%-39%. “We the People” have complied, closed our businesses, sacrificed! 3.2M unemployed. We’re not making income. But Congress (employed by us) is getting full pay. This is wrong. Who agrees?
#COVIDー19

[SheBangs @leabangs]

I love my child but the day after Christmas is a day I cannot wait for bedtime to roll around... #toddlertantrums

[SheBangs @leabangs]

If you like picking up the same 50 sandwich bags off the floor 10k times a day, and putting them into the gallon ziplock because the box is now destroyed....definitely have a toddler

[SheBangs @leabangs]

Folding a fitted bedsheet is an art form. That much like needle-point, I have zero interest or patience in mastering... #screwit

[SheBangs @leabangs]

Dear smokers, please explain something to me... what is it about your disgusting habit that makes you so egocentric to think the entire world is your trash can...?!

[SheBangs @leabangs]

Hey @LilNasX pretty sure "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery" but yeah no it's cool, you can block @mrBobbyBones song... it only makes ppl talk about it more tho... #facepalm

[Mariah @mariahh_elenaa]

WOMEN👏CAN👏BE👏BOSS👏ASS👏BITCHES👏AND👏STILL👏BE👏IN👏LOVING👏MARRIAGES👏 why is it always either “tough chick” or “stepford wife”? Riddle me that #VeronicaMars

[SheBangs @leabangs]

Unpopular opinion: PSA's about fireworks affecting animals and ppl with PTSD are stupid. The 4th happens at the same time, every year. Veterans prepare for this, and animal owners should too. There are many avenues available to help cope. Meds, CBD, essential oils, camping...

[SheBangs @leabangs]

@jobetta @lorna_dryden @SarahKSilverman There are *multiple* ways... go to your vet and get a script for anti-anxiety meds...you live in a state where CBD oil is legal...or use some essential oils. But to just sit and complain; it's not everyone ELSES fault that you didn't prepare...

[SheBangs @leabangs]

@bobbybonesshow @mrBobbyBones She can't censor the whole world though... to ask others to censor themselves just cuz she has a problem with it, is a ridiculous form of narcissism. The world needs to stop being so offended by everything!

[SheBangs @leabangs]

I wish others got as happy when I burped while eating, as we do when the baby lets one loose #braaap

[SheBangs @leabangs]

Living in Colorado is making my rule of not going outside until the temperature is higher than my age, rather difficult... #fuckitscold

[SheBangs @leabangs]

I really don't care if you wanna drive slow, but for goodness sakes, do it in the RIGHT lane

[SheBangs @leabangs]

Just realized the adage "don't cry over spilt milk" is really in reference to breast milk. Cuz I had to remind myself that after spilling 1.5oz right after pumping it #liquidgold #timewasted

[SheBangs @leabangs]

It's amazing how your house can be dirty for days, but the second someone says they're coming over, you're the worlds fastest house cleaner #whitetornado

[Dr. Dave Stukus @AllergyKidsDoc]

The original fraudulent and retracted ‘study’ by Wakefield that originally made up the non existent link between MMR vaccine & autism was a case series of only TWELVE children! https://t.co/cBi9GYU0ed and people still believe vaccines cause autism. Will 1 million kids be enough?

[SheBangs @leabangs]

There is a special place in hell for mail delivery drivers who through the window see you holding a sleeping baby, and ring the doorbell anyway...

[SheBangs @leabangs]

Driving is so easy, we let 16yo's do it. We don't let them vote for two more years tho cuz it's too much responsibility. And yet somehow, grown adults fuck it up on the regular...