lee

[ꪝe @_wej01]

I believe in a matriarchal future because one time my period showed up early on a long-haul flight, and I AirDropped a screenshotted note, “Does anyone have a tampon? Seat 6A,” and 7 women pulled up in less than 2 minutes, and when the flight attendants caught wind, they brought me a heating pad..

[Queen ♡ @QUEENP0P]

One thing about Zendaya is that she can act so well with just her facial expressions, which many actors can't do.

[Hlovo @hlovo_]

😭😭😭😭😭 this guy almost changed the trajectory of his life

[6ɪx✦ @ok6ixx]

I work at a bank and this elderly woman comes in every Tuesday to deposit exactly $20 into her savings account. Sweet lady, always brings cookies. Today she hands me the deposit slip and it says $4,340. I'm like "Mrs. Chen is this right?" and she goes "Oh yes dear, I won the lottery!" Turns out she won $50,000 on a scratcher. I'm congratulating her, asking what she's gonna do, and she says "Well, I'm giving $20,000 to each of my children, and the rest I'm using to hire a man to dig up my ex-husband's grave and move it six feet to the left." Dead silence. She sees my face and goes "What? I bought the family plot. It's MY section. He was sleeping too close to where I'm gonna be." Then she took a cookie from her purse, handed it to me, and shuffled out. My coworker and I just stared at each other.

[NEW YORK KNICKS @nyknicks]

nothin scarier than this 🫣

[comida hq @cormidahq]

ACE POSTING THIS IS SENDING ME #LoveislandUSA

[marqix ☆ @fwmarqix]

My son in-law asked me to teach him how to grill and I might have ruined him.

My daughter got married three years ago. Her husband, Kyle, is a good guy, works in IT, polite, laughs at my jokes even when they're not funny.

But the man cannot grill.

Last summer they hosted a Fourth of July BBQ. Kyle was in charge of the burgers, i watched him flip them eleven times in six minutes. They came out gray, dry, tragic.

I didn't say anything, my wife kicked me under the table twice as a reminder.

Two weeks ago Kyle calls me.

Kyle: Hey, Can I ask you something?

Me: Sure.

Kyle: Would you teach me how to grill? Like, actually grill?

I was honored, genuinely.

Me: Absolutely, come over Saturday.

He showed up at noon with a notebook, A notebook.

Me: You're not taking notes.

Kyle: I want to remember.

Me: It's grilling, not calculus.

I started with the basics, Charcoal vs gas, heat zones, when to flip, the importance of letting meat rest.

He's writing everything down.

Then I got to seasoning.

Me: Most people overthink it, salt, pepper, garlic powder. That's it. You don't need seventeen spices.

Kyle: What about marinades?

Me: Waste of time unless you're doing chicken.

Kyle: Really?

Me: You're adding moisture to something you're about to dry out with fire. Doesn't make sense.

He wrote that down.

Then I said, "And if anyone ever tells you to flip a steak more than once, you walk away from that person."

Kyle: Why?

Me: Because they don't respect the steak.

He stared at me.

Kyle: Are you serious?

Me: Completely.

I could see his brain trying to figure out if I was messing with him. I wasn't.

We grilled for three hours, burgers, steaks, brats. He did great, listened, didn't rush, the kid has potential.

At the end I sent him home with leftovers and a meat thermometer.

Me: Use this, don't guess.

Last weekend my daughter calls.

My daugther: What did you do to Kyle?

Me: What do you mean?

Her: He's obsessed, he bought a new grill, he's watching YouTube videos, he tried to explain 'heat zones' to his mom, she had no idea what he was talking about."

Me: That's good.

Her: He grilled chicken at 9pm last night because he wanted to 'practice his sear.'

Me: Sounds like he's taking it seriously.

Her: Dad, He told my coworker her husband was 'disrespecting the steak.'

I started laughing.

Her: That's not funny, she thought he was crazy.

Me: He's not wrong.

Her: You created a monster.

Me: I created a man who knows how to grill.

She hung up on me.

Yesterday Kyle sent me a picture of a ribeye with perfect grill marks.

The text said: "Flipped once."

I've never been prouder.

[Kee🗽🇵🇷 @Kee_Bully19]

Brunson gets it, fires up a three
Shot, no good, the tip—IT’S GOOD
IT’S GOOD, IT’S GOOD
WITH 1.2 REMAINING
KNICKS TAKE THE LEAD
OG ANUNOBY AND ITS 107-106

[nah @_nahmt]

> be zendaya
> be rejected by the biggest luxury
brands in the world (chanel, dior, gucci, saint laurent and valentino) at the beginning of your career
> hear the brands tell you that you are “inexperienced,” “green” and “just a simple disney actress”
> leave disney, audition for the movie that would change your entire career and meet the love of your life
> win 2 emmy’s and be named one of the 100 most influential people in the entire world at just 25 years old
> value the brands that ALWAYS believed in you
> receive an apology text and a MILLION-DOLLAR contract from valentino, taking back everything that was sai
> see the brands that rejected you one day now competing to dress you
> marry spider-man
> become one of the biggest names in world fashion, through the rejection that never made you stop

[Reality Tv Junkie @Realitea_TvJunk]

They were preforming like their life was on the line and they had no clue it actually was. #Loveislandusa

[cartonero @flanchota]

está chica se hizo viral por ser igual a haaland

[ⓢ @steventaughtme]

TORE nelly AND kelly out the frame. #loveislandusa

[Jenny @teacher_mom03]

When the sheriff shows up in the middle of the neighbor’s firework show & says to shut the show down due to no permit and if they come back it’s a $650 fine. Your neighborhood pow-wows & agrees to split the fine & chance it. 😬 So, they let off the rest of the fireworks as fast as possible & hope the sheriff doesn’t come back. 😬😬😬

[Yonan @yonann]

John Krasinski says his mom talked him out of quitting three weeks before he booked The Office, so she gets 10% of everything

"I said to my mom, 'I'm going to move to New York and be an actor'"

"She said, 'The only thing I ask is that in three years, if you haven't had a bite or a nibble, you have to pull yourself out of this, because as your mother, you can't ask me to tell my son to give up on his dreams'"

"Two and a half years later, I called her and said, 'I did it. I gave it a shot, and I haven't had any nibbles.' She said, 'It's September. Let's talk about it at Christmas. Just finish the year.' Three weeks later, I booked The Office, so I owe my mom 10% of everything"

[lola⁷ @vampkoomn]

DYLAN U WERENT SUPPOSED TO DO THAT YET😭😭😭

[Cardi B @iamcardib]

I had too much fun last night …I high key want to perform at essence fest next year 😅

[J.A. the Architect @MirLagerfield]

😭😭

[Brady @MoeJazulla]

Wheres Jaylen Br-

[Cade Onder @Cade_Onder]

This is how I found out

[𝘽𝙡𝙖𝙠𝙚 @Arealmfngl]

nigga that was they mama😭