Jake Ormiston

34 years old. Video games 🎮 lifting 🏋️ golf ⛳ good food 🍕 and football 🏈

#OnePride
#DetroitVsEverybody
#GoBlue
#LGRW
#RepDetroit

[Magills @magills_]

Social Media addicted women when you tell them they can’t strangle their toddler

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

I love this kid

[Detroit Tigers @tigers]

MAX. CLARK.

[Detroit Tigers @tigers]

TIGERS WIN

[More Perfect Union @MorePerfectUS]

The LAPD declined to renew its Flock contract after an internal audit found 161 false stolen-vehicle alerts in just two months — a 32.3% false-positive rate.

https://t.co/D1KWlW2urY

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

God fuckin damnit

[Adam Schefter @AdamSchefter]

Lions center Cade Mays suffered a wrist injury that now will result in him missing what HC Dan Campbell called “a significant” amount of time.

[Detroit Tigers @tigers]

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...

MAX CLARK 🤩

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

Let's go kid

[Detroit Tigers @tigers]

MAX CLARK'S FIRST @MLB HOME RUN ‼️

@maxxclarkk13

[MLB @MLB]

A dream MLB debut for Max Clark ⚾️

[EdReal @Ed_Realist]

"She committed this crime on the day her husband left the house for 1/2 hour to get groceries because she seemed to be doing better."

See, this is what gets me. She waited until her husband was gone to kill her children. Andrea Yates did the same thing (and also chased down her oldest son who wanted to escape).

If you are *really* crazy, you try to kill your children while your husband is in the house. The fact that you wait until he's gone means you are PLANNING. You WANT to kill your kids. Yes, you're nuts. But there's awareness there, and I have zero compassion.

[Detroit Tigers @tigers]

Time for a spark…⚡️

Welcome to The Show, @maxxclarkk13!

[K @MyNameIsK117]

This REALLY threw me off balance this morning

[Big Willy @bigwillySZN]

It's not quick enough to see potential deadbeats, cheaters and narcissists apparently

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

Women in a nutshell

[Scott Sullivan MMA @sullivan_mma]

Woke up to my spare key on the counter and a note my gf of 5 years left talking about how it's over. I went back to bed and didn't bother to text her. Got a barage of messages about "YOU'RE JUST GONNA LET ME GO!?"

The best days of my life started after that.

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

Love him for this. Urks the fuck out of me the way people do this

[le.hl @0xleegenz]

Edward Norton: "You're not on the spectrum, shut up" and the Silicon Valley trend that aggravates him

Host: "It occurred to me, do you think you're neurodivergent at all"

"Not in a claimable you know, nameable way... this is a pet peeve"

"I may not be right about this but I feel like Silicon Valley has done a lot of cool things and a lot of really negative things to our society"

"One of the ones that I find kind of aggravating what is I would call the romanticization of like the idea of being on the spectrum"

"You get all these people who are just basically assholes wanting to credit that to them being on the spectrum it's like you're not on the spectrum, shut up"

"Like you know stop it and don't do that, don't casually"

Host: "Write off all your bad behaviour"

"Yeah and also don't casually try to claim as a superpower a thing that for a lot of people is a real thing"

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

If I was Bryson I'd take some of that LIV money and pay 4 dudes to beat the shit out of Nick Faldo. Why be that rich if you can't use it

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

I love a good summer storm

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

@DanielsDontCare Literally by double 😂

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

Fuck you Canada this air sucks right now

[Jake Ormiston @lesssthanJake]

Hey Canada can you piss off with the smoke? Thanks