ℳ

[𝓶♡ @Love_bug1016]

girls will scream at the sight of a spider, but hit a curb going 45 mph and not even flinch

[Marcmywords @Marcmywords2]

Don’t cry because they’ve Blocked you, smile because they’ve been Suspended.

[ДρøℂДℓУρ✞îℂ ฬ๏๓คภ ⋆⭒˚.⋆ @W0nderW0manW0w]

I highly recommend not giving a fuck.

[A Bearer Of Dad News @HomeWithPeanut]

My kids can tell you what they will be for the next 3 Halloweens, but ask them what they just had for dinner & they'll say, "we just ate dinner?"

[dan @dadopotamus]

the best version of myself is probably sleeping.

[Sooz @CruisinSoozan]

Well, I’m frying potatoes so that means it’s Monday.
Carbs Heal™️

[JP 🍍 @JPLFR80]

*masturbates

Weigh me now!

[SneezingWithWetMascara @WetMascara]

I've been brushing up on my German, and haute coture means hot hat.

Follow me for more language lessons to be florentine in foreign languages in no time!

[„.-•~¹°”ˆ˜¨𝒰𝓃𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔𝑒𝒹 𝐻𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉¨˜ˆ”°¹~•-.„ @AuthorRKK]

In its hilarity
The mocking bird sings
Unaffected by its
Clipped wings
Musical parodies
That tell the tales
Of roses & sweetgum
& honeybee trails
It twitters alone
In its cage
Unmoved not disheartened
The world its stage

#inkmine

[cathryn 💚🇨🇦 @AngryRaccoon2]

Someone just phoned my house and told me to stop tweeting

[TheException. @Not_The_Rule]

A glory hole but its just you trying to feel my heart beating.

[⎝⎝✧Ṩigᴍ🅰✧⎠⎠ @Lone42wolf]

One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.

[꠸ꪻ’ᦓ ꪑꪊꪀꪖ ꫀꫝ! @CanadianMuna]

The type of love where they make you fall in love with them over and over again >>>

[Mike @Parentpains]

Any goal can be easily achieved, if you run over people who stand in your way with a car.

[The Tipsy Angel 🪽😇 @blonde_opinion]

I don't fall easily for people, but I do for invisible objects on the sidewalk

[✨L.I.N.Ä 🐼🐼🐼 @funnyaries0418]

Being ugly in your teenage makes you understand people around you and many other things…

[TheMentalRecess @amentalrecess]

Let’s be clear twitter. I’m not locked up with you. You are locked up with me.