.

[. @lvhtx300]

I find it so endearing when the old mexican ladies call me papa. “here I give you eh estra sauce papa” thank you so much.. im papa :)

[. @lvhtx300]

the ending to every corporate phone conversation:

"okay thank you, have a good day"

you as well. let me know if you have any questions

"okay will do, thank you, buhbye"

okay buhbye

"mhm buhbye"

*basically whispers* mk buhbye

[toxic king @toxicking]

Look at you freezing in that Shein jacket

[. @lvhtx300]

I would sacrifice my life for these young men

[Robert Greene @RobertGreene]

You can do a lot by avoiding bad as opposed to seeking good.

[MMA Mania @mmamania]

Nate Diaz competing in bare-knuckle MMA when he was 17 years old.

[Lazzyyyyyy @em_Lazzy]

who up rubbing their lil feet together in the bed like a cricket

[. @lvhtx300]

8th grade kid i’ve befriended at the gym:

“you wanna work out with me today? my friend showed me this pirates of the caribbean hardstyle mix so i’m pumped” hahahah

[Navalism @NavalismHQ]

"You have to pick something big to work on, because it's hard to commit your life to something small."

@naval

[. @lvhtx300]

@K_Greenshield9

[Adult Trick or Treater @Paynuspain]

(Lowest point in my life) I should try standup

[ringworm @prawn_meat]

they should give all the college debt to one guy. everyone else clear, one guy 2 trillion in the hole. but no loophole for the guy. his punishments should be real and meaningful

[. @lvhtx300]

Why are expiration dates so mf hard to find?? And then it looks like it was printed in braille? It’s not a secret just tell me lol

[DR22 Ω 🪬🎭 @DejaRu22]

👽 🔨

[. @lvhtx300]

Students with the lowest IQ are majoring in education and social work. Scary

[King Pepe Alexander III🌲🇦🇺 @DisenPepe]

The world’s oldest ongoing construction project; The Basílica de la Sagrada Família, could be the last true building to be finished with transcendence and beauty.

Construction started 139 years ago and is expected to be finished in 10-12 years.

[Dr Jordan B Peterson @jordanbpeterson]

Could this be any more soul chilling? Is it real? Does a fate such as this await us?

[. @lvhtx300]

I used to be embarrassed to watch in case we make eye contact. But now I'm conditioned, I stare. I've seen second time offenders blatantly lie while walking past "I didn't know we had cookies!" I also keep a running tally of who's ate what. Our accountant ate 4 cookies just today

[. @lvhtx300]

Looking out my office I can see a section of the coffee bar- which has hella cookies. The cookies are communal but employees still sneak them. I watch people scan the room with guilt before snatching one. Some people rummage through the overhead cabinet as a disguise, but I know.