another girl in my circle died of cancer within a year of finding out she had it and i can’t stop sobbing. she was my age and beautiful and talented and made some of the best work i had ever seen and the women who inspire me keep dying
climate change sucks cancer sucks being obsessed with how fat we are feels so fucking absolutely insanely ridiculous when you look at the misery from climate change that is only just the beginning
i carry so much grief for so much loss, over people and time and the future none of us will get to have that we were promised. i love living so very much and the loss of all of these things that inspire it is enough to break me if i think about it too much.
three of the best men anyone could ever know and the most talented photographers i have ever seen died of cancer in our circle in the last ten years. one model i know survived her second diagnosis and is raising children now, always afraid of its return
@ventaccountofM i have a feeling she really adores you and it will be okay if you connect about it. i don’t know anyone that would go to poetry reading with someone that they didn’t genuinely care for. best of luck
@ventaccountofM if i invite someone out with me ahead of time, it’s because i want to see them, not their friends. if it’s a mutual friend group and we all hang out together all the time that’s different, but that’s rare. it’s usually someone inviting strangers last minute and i will bail
@ventaccountofM for me i felt disrespected because i can mask well but i don’t like meeting new people when i’m not prepared to and group hang outs are challenging for me, especially in public settings. it kind of feels like my company isn’t good enough for them on my own.
this is weird to notice as an adult, like really weird, but one of my friends who wasn’t fat started ozempic to lose a few extra lbs and since she’s lost more weight, she has stopped liking my selfies and stories on my personal page. she used to gas up my stuff all the time.