Matt Saraniti

I'm an RN [insert 'Meet the Parents' joke here] I have an unhealthy obsession with sour cream & the gym; vegetarian. ISFJ. #Buckeyes #Boston #Sicilian

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton Looks like you’ve got some new competition this season 🤨

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton You got greedy and now you went and got the man demoted 😔

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton @KutterIsKing I’m in a group chat with Cornell, I assure you he’s fed up with me by now

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton Apparently I don’t have to worry about y’all too much longer 🫠

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton First off, I hate that when typing ‘Andrew’ to compose this post my first suggestion was Tate haha.

This guy didn’t listen to you!

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton @jcalvinmeyer HA! Well I guess then it’s clear that the person who put together that list I shared with you was just fat shaming you guys.

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton I wonder how many stats they had to comb through until they found one that Baltimore is a leader in 🤔

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton I can vividly picture Lampson rockin’ this in the streets of Boston.

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton Haha yeah no shit, he’s a lucky man.

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton random question - the Sunbury’s, they husband/wife or siblings??

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton
Remind me what the etiquette is -
is it “appropriate” for a fan of a team who didn’t make the playoffs to bust the balls of a fan of a team (in the same division) who got swept out of the playoffs in the first round because they scored only a single run?

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton Ha! I’m actually second guessing my picks as we speak — with all this conference realignment you can no longer pick like an OU and have a high degree of confidence they’ll finish undefeated and win the Big 12

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton lol I said the exact same thing, but I feel like that’d be an insult to Ai because it can’t possibly be THAT dumb!

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton
You definitely wrote this, admit it.

https://t.co/Rfp6pxMhwn?

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton I’m concerned that you’re going to put the college football pool on the back burner because the O’s will be in the playoffs this year and (for the first time ever) you’ll need to manage your time between these two competing entities.

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@StopandShop
My total when I checked out yesterday: $140.34 with 25+ items

My total today in the email order summary: $53.58 with LESS THAN 10 items!
Where is the other 70% of my groceries???

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton
https://t.co/WPBSwBTKgT

[Matt Saraniti @mSaraniti]

@andrewchelton You’d better not be the team that allows Judge to pass Maris…