Maggie 🦔

23

[𝗆𝗒𝖺˚🦋༘⋆ @belairestt]

please let the eagles win #SuperBowl

[Public Enemies Podcast @PublicEnemiesHQ]

Cooper DeJean after getting a pick 6 on Patrick Mahomes:

#SuperBowl

[our beautiful rat king @tenderpbj]

“exciting news” is an understatement about something that has me in tears

[rin @serrendipities]

he will be a single mom and i will not pay child support :(

[big ess☆ @sephorasvibe]

tiktok comments are not loading and unfortunately i cannot watch tiktoks without accessing the comments

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

why the fuck is my laundry bin always full i’m not even going anywhere

[Brendan Spiegel @BrendanSpiegel_]

This is what the streaming era took from us

[Bill @Lezzemos]

Whoever gave Jameis Winston a microphone and let him run around Super Bowl media day deserves a massive raise.

[NBACentel @TheNBACentel]

NO WAY. 😭😭😭

[𝔻𝕖𝔹𝕒𝕝𝕝 @WfromDeBall]

Start, bench, cut.

[cee @cssavedme]

danny ainge finding out it was luka to the lakers 30 minutes before it was confirmed

[Kalshi Hoops @KalshiHoops]

never forget.

[John Fadule @fadule_]

Hangover cure:

1. Invite 2 of your boys over because you don’t wanna be alone
2. Also invite 3 baddies who played Soccer at your College (they’re emotionally mature and their bodies are insane)
3. Make a pot of black coffee and start a Harry Potter marathon
4. Develop a crush on the girl nearest you during Prisoner Of Azkaban (she’s taking it seriously and she smells like your hot childhood babysitter’s car)
5. Hit the gym with her while the others nap
6. Play “For The First Time” by The Script on the drive home and agree you both miss High School
7. Watch Goblet Of Fire with her legs on your lap
8. Make dinner as a group (comfort food), slip off to your bedroom with her while the mac & cheese is in the oven and bang phenomenally for 45 minutes (43.5 minutes longer than you usually last)
9. To your surprise a snowstorm starts - all your Monday obligations get cancelled
10. Take a pause break during Half-Blood Prince to smash in separate rooms: you and your crush go to your bedroom, one couple takes the kitchen while the other takes the couch
11. Play Monopoly in teams of 2 - secure the Red and Yellow properties early and win in 90 minutes
12. Order deluxe-sized acai bowls while the girls make chocolate-chip cookies (don’t ask people if they want one just get them one like Mark Wahlberg would)
13. Look out the window at the snowfall during the opening jingle of the Deathly Hallows Pt. II and think to yourself ‘wow life is a miracle - I’m so lucky to be alive’

Important:
1) Pull the window blinds down to eliminate glare on the TV screen
2) Don’t lift together but check in with each other every 20 minutes
3) Don’t even think about wearing a condom
4) The girls are allowed to eat the mac & cheese but you and your boys aren’t
5) Answer questions the girls have about the movies without giving anything away

[Sam Quinn @SamQuinnCBS]

I love how the Spurs just looked at the 30-team table, identified the two suckers, and made it a point to keep trading with them over and over and over again.

[BECK @bathroomass]

They traded Homer to Family Guy for Cleveland and a first round Meg

[Dexerto @Dexerto]

The Dallas Mavericks have traded Top 500 Overwatch 2 player Luka Doncic to the Los Angeles Lakers

The Mavericks got Anthony Davis in return