crocodile enthusiast

Julian linguini. panty dropper, quitter.
it’s the method of the crocodile that I appreciate.

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

You’re 3 inches inside Jesus, Judas is 3 inches inside you … which way you moving??

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

Finally having to do something that reflects my event lead job title

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

Gwyneth Paltrow I’m hexing you and your bloodline. Sorry Apple it’s just what has to happen

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

People who are into parkour have a level of self confidence that I view as sinful

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

Can you imagine being the first person who realized parrots are copying you. Like that ho is tattling on you and now what

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

Getting home at 7am I need to act normal

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

@judejon_ @LouieFanaticBoy Damn did she eat your ass yet? 😍

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

When your food spot lowkey smells like a Kmart you know it’s gonna hit

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

Gavin Newsom wants to be a wigga but HIS HEART ISNT IN IT

[Sarah @slaayrah]

When the world’s your oyster and you’re lowkey the pearl

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

Was told by two men that I “movie-mogged” them yesterday and my dick has been hard ever since!

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

Everyone started talking about how he loves bigger black dudes and he made sure to have paparazzi clock him jajajajajajajaha

[TMZ @TMZ]

🥰 Andy Cohen holds hands with Kevin Sobieski, leaving a dinner date.

Exclusive details: https://t.co/IXgn4AkX6f

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

It’s been pride month for like 2 days and I should already be caged up for behavioral issues

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

Went to see backrooms with my friends:: fell asleep in a embarrassing way. Self harm is pending. can’t tell you shit about the movie

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

@jimmyjohns just give Mike a chance

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

2 blocks in Uptown is exactly ONE play of Wifin You by Montana of 300

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

No, we have to park somewhere else, that bunny just saw me hit the curb real bad

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

@jimmyjohns just give Mike a chance

[crocodile enthusiast @mallorymalaria]

@bridgetsdiaryy we got hermit female respecters in the building 🙏 thank god. Maybe 2026 can be okay

[plan b @bridgetsdiaryy]

study abroad? well first off id never call a woman that

[roro, PhD @fuglibetty]

Of course, he who has a peanut allergy garners my sympathy. But he will never garner my respect. You were not meant for this earth and you are on borrowed time