Mara

[Mara @maraajohnson]

please please take your time to watch this until the end you will not regret it

[mafia ☆ boy @levicarter]

i watch my own story ova n over again and y’all think i care bout y’all

[PYPER🍒 @pyperxox]

me at a restaurant acting like i didn’t google the menu 3 days ago

[Mara @maraajohnson]

@payden_17 Why is this the funniest tweet 😂😂😂

[jay ✰ @jayythewave]

sometimes idk what people say i just laugh so they can go away

[clit eastwood @bruhgirl2001]

i realized i don’t like going on dates i just like interviewing people

[Mara @maraajohnson]

@Lance_D1826 who?

[Rachel @femaleredhead]

oh your boyfriend’s a doctor? well my boyfriend is now the coach of an imaginary football team for the next 4 months

[Tommy @_TommyMason]

"Free for a quick call? Easier to explain on the phone."

[Porter @ItsRetrop]

it’s like yo car gets jealous when you doing good in life

[Andrew Weinstein @Weinsteinlaw]

If 400 trained police officers weren’t prepared to engage, what’s the argument for arming kindergarten teachers?

[Jack Harlow @jackharlow]

Nothing like a woman in some scrubs😍😍😍😍 thank you for your service

[Dr. Neighborhood Publicist @nhoodpublicist]

I don’t care if it’s ageism, nobody 70+ years old got any business making decisions for a world they won’t truly be affected by. If retirement age 62-65 everywhere else it need to apply to all government positions

[emma lord @dilemmalord]

"romance novels are all so predictable" OF COURSE THEY ARE i go to starbucks and make the same order every time because i want to CONSUME THE THING THAT I LOVE over and over dear god let us LIVE

[full-snack developer 🇭🇹 @notdanilu]

if you’ve ever worked a customer service job of any kind you know that people will really tell you their business unprovoked