Mary

pedestrian

[Mary @marschade1]

physically i’m in college, mentally i’m at the scholastic book fair

[Noah Kahan @NoahKahan]

Chicago omg

[Georgia Coley @artwithinpod]

I liked A Complete Unknown but it must be said: Timothée getting all the praise and nominations for his (kinda one note?) performance as Bob Dylan instead of his incredibly layered performance as Paul Atreides is genuinely insane

[Ara @lefilmara]

Happy Oscars day? Well, No! Today is actually the 18-year anniversary of Tashi’s career-ending injury AND her breakup with Patrick… and to make things worse, Challengers got ZERO noms. This is actually a day of tragedy for Challengers enjoyers. We are in mourning.

[KNICKS IN 5💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡 @alsostephenking]

sleepy joe you’ve got two months. go crazy. eliminate all student debt. legalize marijuana. make tampons and condoms free. ban cybertrucks. shit in the oval office’s air vent. kidnap barron. the world is your oyster buddy

[FOX College Football @CFBONFOX]

Only one team has not allowed any rushing touchdowns this season- @HuskerFootball 🌽💪

[Mary @marschade1]

@TrueTeaBrewer i missed u trueteabrewer

[Skyler Krull @krull_skyler]

Fuck Iowa

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

Groceries too expensive? Just stop eating, you poors. Also don’t look at our price gouging record breaking profits.

[John Kennedy @FrazzleMyGimp]

I know I will face consequences for this but I am done staying quiet. NFL games are 100% scripted. I know this because I was apart of a team of writers that wrote this years Super Bowl. Don’t believe me? Tell me if this looks familiar.

[depths of wikipedia! @depthsofwiki]

how have I never heard about this war clouds comment

[ELLɅ MɅCHINɅ @orchidcamp]

guy hearing about the mcdonald's happy meal for the first time: [eyes welling up with tears] a happy meal. i think i'd like that. i'd like that very much

[ali sousa ✨ @alisousa4]

i am wearing my tick tick boom sweatshirt to the airport and my dad just very sincerely said “do you think maybe that’s not the best sweatshirt to wear through airport security”

[Bill Bria @billbria]

wild choice to have Lea Michele chased by her biggest fear: letters

[John Kennedy @FrazzleMyGimp]

When I was a staff writer at Nickelodeon, I pitched a spinoff show for Miranda Cosgrove called ICarly. Here was the original script I wrote for them

[John Kennedy @FrazzleMyGimp]

The cool thing about writing for Disney channel is I got to write for every show. Here is one of my scripts I wrote for Hannah Montana in 2006 that didn’t get to air.