Mashed Taters

special needs

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

@SleeperHQ AJ Frown

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

@jennmkc @kelechi_xo No you shouldn’t, that stupid.

[Flyers Media Information @FlyersMediaInfo]

The Flyers made the playoffs after sitting nine points out of the second Wild Card spot on March 10. Per NHLStats, Philadelphia became the first team in NHL history to make the playoffs after facing that large of a point deficit through 60 or more games played in a season.

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

@BrewersOfMKE @GTJGlazer Just tell your kids “no”

[Jaeger Media @jaegermedia1]

Whiteboy summer is so back.

[Freddie @FreddieTheOsFan]

I couldn’t tell you who would win a best-of-7 US-DR series. No one can. But the folks who treated it like a foregone conclusion the DR would blow the doors off the US because they go line-dancing for every base hit shouldn’t be taken seriously.

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

Aura doesn’t win baseball games

[meg ortwein @megortwein]

team usa literally has no aura. they be waiting for dudes to round the bases after an incredibly emotional home run like

😀🫸

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

🫵😂

[Talkin' Baseball @TalkinBaseball_]

Canada's WBC players are all wearing hockey jerseys before their game against USA

Tyler O'Neill cut the sleeves off of his

(via @ShiDavidi, @thehazelmae)

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

This dude is just gaymaxxing tbh

[Clavicular @Clavicular0]

5pm est. March 13th. https://t.co/8p1gR9CnAg

[☁️ @guiilltyasin]

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[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

@90syankskid Jazz really showed up tn

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

@90syankskid Dawgs

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

@americantantrum @WBCBaseball Buddy believes 🫵😂

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

Soft

[Talkin' Baseball @TalkinBaseball_]

Tarik Skubal is scheduled to throw 55 pitches against Great Britain in the World Baseball Classic and then return back to Detroit Tigers Spring Training, per @BNightengale

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

Team Jew is traveling via tunnel to Citi field

[SNY Mets @SNY_Mets]

The Mets face Team Israel today at Clover Park

⏰: 1:10 p.m.

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

“I had no idea modelo got you drunk”

[Spittin' Chiclets @spittinchiclets]

ABSOLUTE CINEMA 🍿

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

@hasbybets @MSUFanJay @iPaulCanada Maybe the dumbest tweet I’ve ever seen

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

@Philly_Mays At least the Eagles are still in the playoffs

[Mashed Taters @mash3d_potat0es]

Reasons like this is why I’ll never leave this app

[Sgt Blackout 🫡 @coldcallsniper]

Need a 1st down here to keep the drive going. Been a few days since we have reached pay dirt.

1st and 10: Liked her IG story 23 hours after she posted it. I stood out. She noticed. 7 yard gain.

2nd and 3: Sent her a funny IG reel. She read it, no response. False start, 5 yard penalty. Replay 2nd down.

2nd and 8: Posted a wholesome picture holding my baby nephew on my feed. Caption: “Can’t wait to stay a part of your life forever.” Showed stability, showed commitment, and showed heart. She liked the photo. 7 yard gain.

3rd and 1: My brain tells me to run a halfback dive up the A gap and tell her she’s the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my life and how it would be my absolute honor to take her out on a date. But I am a gambler, just like my father and his father before him. I wanna score here. Play action fake to the running back and go for it all. I heart eyes her story of her at the gym and say, “Wyd tn?” She doesn’t open it for 24 hours. Incomplete pass.

4th and 1: Season is on the line. This is for all the marbles. I am at the bottom barrel of the playbook. Calling on my OC for a money play and he is useless. Need to get creative here. Need to think out of the box. Smarter me than me would kick 3 and take the points, but that’s not why I play the game. We decide we are going to go HB toss to the right. I remember in the film room preparing for the game who her favorite DJ is when she posted his audio in her last couple posts. It’s all about the details. I see he is playing this weekend in our city. I buy two tickets and ask her if she wants to go. She responds, yes, but can I bring a friend? I tell her I only have two tickets. She says she will let me know. I tell her I have a bag. She says, okay, I’m down. The dust clears, the ball barely and I mean barely crosses the line. The refs move the chains. I can’t wait for Saturday night