mass milk barf

Ain't I a stinker?

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

At the club looking at my own tweets. I did it for the love of the game. A lot of you don't see it. I practice mindfulness by telling myself, and you, that that's okay.

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

Everyone talks about being fumbled with such a smug superiority. Being fumbled sucks. I wonder if the humble football, tumbling despairingly out of the wide receiver's once welcoming, now flailing arms, feels the same sadness.

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

My dreams have come true

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

The only 2 things stopping me from copping a 2nd gen early 00s outback is miles in the 200k+ range and chronic head gasket issues. Look at this faux wood interior. Combined with an aftermarket system...brings a tear to the eye...

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

I get why people in LA are the way they are now

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

It is Haru Day

[Cool Cat @CoolCatlovesyou]

There's a lot of crazy stuff going on, and I want you all to Stay Safe!! And that's because Cool Cat Loves You!! 😍

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

@usaidiwasafool I passed him on my bike and offered him a silent prayer. He needs it more than anyone rn

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

You would humiliate me through inviting me to something through an app's automated text? You're really going to make me download Partiful so I can figure out who's tea party this is?

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

Biked around, saw a friend and got coffee, hammocked for 2 hours, drank an aperol spritz and now I'm going to see a movie by myself. Nauseous from all this motion. Wouldn't wish it on anyone

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

@wigglygar I'm sorry but I don't think I'm comfortable going back to what we were. Sorry to put a damper on things.

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

Can't wait for fall so I can start dressing (wearing overalls to work)

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

Sherwin Williams hold line is playing some shit that sounds like what Mario would hear trying to run up those damn stairs

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

Just learned that people are calling themselves "chopped" now not in reference to being a fun amount of high but for perceiving oneself as being physically unattractive

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

Occupying a cushier "project manager"-lite roll at my job which means I get to draw little mini Sam's on all the whiteboard surfaces to boost morale. Give the troops something to fight for

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

They shouldn't be playing BCNR at the bowling alley right now. Feels like we're getting profiled.

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

Compartmentalizing the stress from work by looking my hands covered in grease and small cuts when I get home and going "these hands..."

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

Have had a pretty rough couple of weeks from overwork, but the silver lining is I realized I can buy beers and walk over to my friend's house to jump on his trampoline unannounced whenever I want

[mass milk barf @masnilknarf]

@B0Hboi @wigglygar You get your money back on the gas discount