Mike, sometimes

Mostly jokes. Mostly bad ones. Also a musician living in LA.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@PFTompkins @ScottAukerman I live in a rural part of Washington. Care to explain this shit, Grizz? Or should I say Krizz?

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@Tommytoughstuff Duofingo

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

When a toddlers footsteps halt outside the bathroom door and all you can do is pray from the toilet.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@KeetPotato It seems to be heavily based on “The Turn of the Screw”, a novel that similarly wastes 10 hours of your life. I guess they nailed that part in the adaptation.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

Well folks, here’s how the zombie apocalypse starts: Johnson & Johnson pauses Covid-19 vaccine trial after 'unexplained illness'
https://t.co/4aDUbdc12W

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@robdelaney @AppleBooks The Mystery of the Exploding Teeth

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@Skoog @desukidesu Earth shattering dad energy here

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@WhoseRyanStiles Charred beet shit

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@mrsg_echs @ProjectLITComm This is a fun and creepy short film that I used to help teach foreshadowing: https://t.co/eYisV7YC16

Also, hard to go wrong with Poe. My students enjoyed “Cask of Amontillado”

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@ItsSamG Fuck (ing hell) no.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@hellolanemoore As this kid and this adult, I can confirm this as accurate.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@joshcomers Sleeper tweet for those in the know and absolutely the best possible answer.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@DollarShaveClub #paintmyballs #contest
A poem with two stanzas in haiku form about the importance of balls in the perpetuation of our species:
-
Each new human is
A universe incarnate
Born of Love’s Big Bang.

Youth’s true fountain comes
Not from stone, spring, or bottle
But two divine balls.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@DollarShaveClub Each new human is
A universe incarnate
Born of Love’s Big Bang.

Youth’s true fountain comes
Not from stone, spring, or bottle
But two divine balls.

#paintmyballs #Contest

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@MaraWilson It’s an ingredient in masala. Super delicious. Here’s a good one with cauliflower. https://t.co/RI3j7S3aXN

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@WamplerPedals Here’s a little thing I did in quarantine with the help of some octave fuzz and featuring a lot of the terraform Leslie effect: https://t.co/48rhauCbSC

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@LeaKThompson Florida man loses his shorts while breaking into a car dealership.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@aalexandriabish O’Julius

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@WamplerPedals SourceAudio Collider. That right after your very own Terraform is literally too much power.

[Mike, sometimes @masonmg]

@MarkAgee @DougBenson Picturing a workout montage with the curb your enthusiasm music as the soundtrack.