benson.

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

“      𝘾𝘼𝙋𝙏𝘼𝙄𝙉
𝙊𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙖⠀ 𝘽𝙚𝙣𝙨𝙤𝙣 . ”

♱ ♱ ♱ ♱

[֯ ⁎ 𓉸ྀི @doverots]

everything i’ve ever let go of has claw marks on it.

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

@vincitous @foreigxer

[ꨄ @lostaffections]

he's my partner, and i need him.

[eli @stablerspawn]

“      𝙀𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙤𝙩
(𝙀𝙡𝙞) 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚𝙧 𝙅𝙧. . ”

♱ ♱ ♱ ♱

[𝓛𝓲𝓿 @steadfastcapt]

ℙ𝕠𝕤𝕤𝕚𝕓𝕝𝕖 ℂ𝕠𝕞𝕖𝕓𝕒𝕔𝕜?

ℕ𝕖𝕨 📌

“𝔻𝕠𝕟’𝕥 𝕡𝕠𝕤𝕥𝕡𝕠𝕟𝕖 𝕛𝕠𝕪, 𝕠𝕜𝕒𝕪?”

ℝ𝕋?

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

@foreigxer || can I dm you ?

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

again ,

she doesn't have selective hearing .
she heard what she heard.

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

did she say she hasn't slept ?
nah , she meant she has slept .
definitely slept .

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

mhm ,
she doesn't have selective hearing

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

she didn't.

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

painfully obvious.

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

" you have no one else ? "

she again was still standing in front of her.
obviously she was talking about herself.

she didn't think it silly for them to be together ,
she would've done it easy with Elliot if he didn't leave her .
but

here she was again,
making it +

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

in order to not be alone ."

she says while keeping her arms against her chest.

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

" you're asking me that?
the one whose had people abandon her multiple times , even Elliot left me without a good bye and that hurt me the most. or ones I've gotten close to in that sense have been killed.

who says I like being alone too ?
you don't have to go to him -

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

what if she did ?

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

she hasn't slept in like three days .
( liv , you did not hear that )

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

" just a silly thought ,
but deep down I know you're still thinking about it . .

and you wonder why your trust issues are high . . because he keeps getting away with shit ."

she says while folding her arms against his chest .

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

my girl?
that was a new one ,
especially coming from her .

her eyes stayed on Alexs hand ,
giving a small smile ,
something she rarely did any more.
her walls were all the way up since Elliot left .
so they better not take her from her again.

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

" that's my girl . "

she grins , squeezing olivia's hand gently , the contact never felt like enough , alex had bounced from place to place so often since that night outside the bar , but this was her home .

svu , new york , ( olivia ) that was home .

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

she chewed on her lower lip ,.cheeks flushed at the last comment.

she has always wanted that.
at least with her .
her and Elliot were some of the most important people in her life . and to be with either one was a great honor to her .

" of - of course I do "

she said quietly.

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

" maybe , maybe not , i don't know . "

she nips her bottom lip in between her teeth , the uncertainty only half of what makes her anxious .

" but, if we work , i want us to try , if that's what you want . "

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

her eyes fall down on Alex's hand on her own,
she missed Elliot,
more then anyone knew .

her thumbs twiddle together as she listened to her speak. her voice sounding small and vulnerable.

" what if we work,
will they still make you leave? "

she asks quietly.

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

" then I'll find my way back again . "

she sighs softly , offering a sad smile .

" liv , i'm not elliot , i'm gonna come back , i'm not going to disappear. i promise you . "

her voice is gentle , soft , her words whispered on a breath .

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

she's listening to her speak,
she might have a point,
but they could work it out.

" well,

that's their loss . . "

and what if it works out ?

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

that part is true,
she was one of the main ones who came back.

Elliot leaving will always leave a scar.
she still thinks about him, way too much.
but Alex always some how finds her way back.

" but,
what if they make you leave me again? "

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

" i've always come back to you , "

alex murmers , softening her features the way only olivia can make her do .

" no matter how far ive gone , i somehow always end up here , with you . "

her hand finds itself atop olivia's , comforting in its simplicity.

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

it's not that she's a woman,
it has nothing to do with that .

" I'm just ,
I'm used to people leaving me.
I'm used to people leaving without a word , and I often wonder if it's me . . "

she says quietly ,
her hands fold together as she sits before Alex .

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

" what are you struggling with liv ? "

she raises an eyebrow not unkindly,
tucking her blonde hair behind her ear .

" what's wrong ? "

she wonders if it's her , if it's not her , but her gender . if she were a man, would she be struggling ?

[benson. @maternalcaptcin]

" I can't . . .

it's just . . .
it's hard you know ? "

she . .
she knew she liked Alex .
she struggled with emotions ,.she struggled showing anything , because people have left her .

what happens if she says what she feels now?

[𝑹𝑬𝒀𝑵𝑶𝑳𝑫𝑺 ☘︎ @sinofthemother]

yes ?

felt like what ? ...