Matt

Alexa, write something pithy and fun. Alexa, no, don't just write "something pithy and fun" but make something up. ALEXA, STOP. Alexa, for the love of god. AL--

[Daily Chiefs @Daily_Chiefs_]

“The Chiefs have been cheating for years and the NFL helps them..”

Normal Dude: “Really?”

“Yep, and the refs have been favoring them for years!”

Normal Dude: “Ok, so I can look into how many penalties are called against them, and how many are called against their opponents”

“They actually already track that, it’s called Penalty Differential”

Normal Dude: “And how much better are the Chiefs in that stat than the rest of the league?”

“Well they are actually the 2nd worst in the league in the last 7 years…”

Normal Dude: “Oh…. Ok”

“But it’s not about how many penalties, it’s about when the penalties are called”

Normal Dude: “ok, like to extend a drive? Does anyone track those penalties?

“Yes they do.”

Normal Dude: “And how far ahead are the Chiefs in that one?”

“Well they are actually ranked 22nd in the NFL during the Dynasty’s run..”

Normal Dude: “Hmm…”

“But forget that, the penalties have directly led to their Super Bowl wins!”

Normal Dude: “Okay, do they track Penalty differential for those SB teams as well?”

“They sure do!”

Normal Dude: “And how do the Chiefs differential compare to other SB winners?”

“Well from 2017-2024, they were the only SB winner with a Negative penalty differential…”

Normal Dude: “So out of 8 SB winners they were the only team to win it with a negative differential once?

“Actually they had a negative differential for all 3 SB wins..”

Normal Dude: “Hmm…”

“But it’s more about the penalties that happen, but never get called”

Normal Dude: “Ok…. And where do the Chiefs rank in that statistic?”

“No one actually tracks it, because it’s too subjective… but I’ve seen a lot of trolls and haters post clips on X.”

Normal Dude: “Sure… (stifles a laugh) that sounds real! 😂”

[Robert Behrens @rcb05]

Sees 67-year-old Madonna on the World Cup halftime: “Couldn’t they get someone more culturally relevant in 2026?”

Sees the 71-year-old Muppets come on screen: “Hell yeah.”

[Hayden @the_transit_guy]

Iran_deal_version23_final-final.pdf

[Matt @matt_snively]

@chrisbrunet Great, I want neither of those things. So nice they made this one easy.

[Matt @matt_snively]

@itsoksmit The trick for “idea guys” like me is to keep your ideas small. A focused analytics dashboard. Fantasy Tour de France tracking. Political accountability websites.

Don’t let your idea reach outstretch your idea grasp.

[Coder girl 👩‍💻 @dev_maims]

Lol 😂😂😂

[Trent @BarstoolTrent]

Gotta be tough when you’re a goalie after a mistake like that and the action is on the other end and you’re just standing there like man they’re probably frying me on the internet

[Pop Crave @PopCrave]

9 years ago today, Kesha released “Praying.”

[Matt @matt_snively]

@3YearLetterman @MaggieLJohnson Definitely small claims court.

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

I bet this goes hard if you’re fucking stupid

[Dave @Mesut_Ausil]

every business guy associated with Trump looks like a Where in The World Is Carmen Sandiego character named something like Bry Berry or Steel Lin Cash

[Florian Ederer @florianederer]

Individual preference predictors for Messi:
1) Progressive ideology
2) Interest in politics
3) Highly educated

Ronaldo:
1) Short video consumption
2) High self-confidence
3) Authoritarian orientation

[Matt @matt_snively]

@rodger It’s because I had American dollars on Ronaldo 4+ SoG. It has to be.

[Matt @matt_snively]

Elon committing crimes against humanity and joking about it is so very on brand for 2026.

[Hank Green @hankgreen]

It’s funny, motocross at the White House is, like, fine with me. But here’s an example of something that is genuinely unforgivable but that a lot of people seem to have moved right past.

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

People keep saying we’re in Idiocracy but President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho at his core wanted what was best for his people and when evidence presented itself he listened to experts to solve the problem. By all accounts a better leader than this.

[Justin🦩Boldaji @justinboldaji]

I know comparing modern society to Idiocracy is really played out but man

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

I saw a post on Reddit that said that “The underlying purpose of AI is to allow wealth to access skill while removing from the skilled the ability to access wealth.” And I don’t think I’ve ever seen AI described so incisively.

[Troll Football @TrollFootball]

Respect Italy

[Matt @matt_snively]

We have moved past “proof” being needed as the basis of an accusation. Not a compliment.

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

RAJU: But what evidence is there to prove the California election is rigged?

MIKE JOHNSON: Look, some of these efforts are so diabolical and so far upstream it's impossible to prove. But I think everybody knows instinctively that something is wrong here.

[Julian Nicholas @JNicholasNYC]

the knicks city dancers should launch copies of the epstein files from the t-shirt cannons