Matt Gossen

I write. Hopefully better than this bio.

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@Tyrannosau_Russ I get it!!!!

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

Get a load of this hedonist ginger cannibal

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

My dad took time out of his California vacation to hit the picket lines with his son #wgastrong #wgastrike

[follow @bencollins on bluesky @oneunderscore__]

This is true. Here's Conan spinning his wedding ring during the 2007 writers' strike just to fill airtime. It was like this for months.

NBC was lucky that Conan is the GOAT, but it's impossible to explain to Gen Z how bad the content will get if there's another one.

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@BRITT4INE @MattGourley

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@MissDiedra @BDaveWalters And now I’ll never stop hearing it

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@MissDiedra @BDaveWalters 🙌

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

It’s 10 to midnight and I’m eating what I hope is a forgivable amount of the charcuterie plate my wife bought for a casual gathering with her friends tomorrow AMA

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

I mean now I gotta taste it

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@DanHamamura ❤️🧀

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@MissDiedra 😍

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

as a color blind person I find this cruel and offensive

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

Okay

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

It’s been 31 years since Kevin McCallister didn’t take even one damn bite of that delicious looking highly nutritious microwave macaroni and cheese dinner

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

I wonder what the downstairs neighbors think the sound of me dropping the AppleTV remote 700 times a day is

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@jlazebnik Them: So what are you working on?
Me: Oh, you know, everything and nothing.

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

My nephew is wearing Bulls socks, a Cubs jersey (over a Blackhawks jersey) and a Giants hat. Also pictured: a discarded Cubs hat.

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@AndyRichter I mean if you’re gonna buy an elevator buy Otis

[Matt Gossen @mattgossen]

@BrianStack153 Same. Though my first thought was “they missed”

[Rob LaZebnik @Rlazebnik]

Our idea a few years ago: maybe they look like donuts? Please check out the movie Extinct, which I co-wrote and produced with @joelcjoelc and John Frink. Directed by the amazing @tubatron. Premiering on Netflix today! #extinct