M@yonnaise

Not famous people dont deserve their own bios.

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

#Cyberpunk2077Sweepstakes

[XBOX @XBOX]

Own a rare piece of Night City!

RT with the tag #Cyberpunk2077Sweepstakes for a chance to win the Limited Edition @CyberpunkGame console.

US/CA/MX Only | 18+ | End 06/01/20 | Rules: https://t.co/72hgPXv0Xv

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

Black mirror is basically a warning of what would happen if everyone became catholic and listened to their parents

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

Also Madonna hasn’t aged in 30 years and not 1 person I’ve talked to tonight suspects her of being a witch

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

If I was a sound, I’d be an awkward silence.

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

Would you rather be able to have echolocation hearing like a bat or be able to change colors like a chameleon?

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

@_BossDaws @_BossDaws yeah let your emotions eat u up inside

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

Say “Fuck this game, man!” 10X fast

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

You ever have diarrhea so bad that when u fart it feels like you’re dry heaving out of your asshole?

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

You ever have diarrhea so bad that when u fart it feels like you’re dry heaving out of your asshole?

[adult swim @adultswim]

We wish we could ‘like’ things in real life.

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

Architecture is kinda like playing the sims. Except instead of removing the door to the bathroom so they have to pee themselves, you make the bathrooms ADA comply so that people in wheelchairs won’t.

[my polemical romance @realdealcreal]

Should I be worried about how often I say "you're all I need" to my cat when I'm hungover

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

If you knew the context I swear you’d get the joke

[my polemical romance @realdealcreal]

In the name of sportsmanship I think when fighters get in each other's faces they should be required to smooch a lil bit

[Unfridgeworthy @Unfridgeworthy]

The plot twist that movie needed.

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

@_BossDaws @_BossDaws

[M@yonnaise @mattwheelchair]

@_BossDaws A jar of mayo is a better friend than @_BossDaws