Matthew Conroy

[pjeffa (🦧,🦧) @jeff82874662]

My dad texting me to warn me that Taco Bell poisoned a bunch of customers in New York State

My brother in Christ, the safest day to fly in the history of the world was September 12, 2001

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

@AaravSatturu Not round here partner

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Is there going to be anything better than being a father and shamelessly posting as much as I can about my children

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Imagine this with upside down playing because I’m feeling curious

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Is there a way to add music to a tweet?

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Sending a message on teams to someone I haven’t pinged yet gets me the exact same amount of giddy that sending a risky text does. I was asked to stop twirling around in my spinny chair after sending them by the site leader though :(

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Tried the spicy chicken nuggets then did a little tango #mindifispeakalittlespanish

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Empty classrooms are the Michael Jordans of study spots

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Let’s play a fun game called how long will it take the girl next to me to realize she’s the only one in this hall talking.

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

The grind continues. Just killed an entire box of thin mints and am headed to bed!

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

The grind has officially started. Out the door at 11:30 sharp with 18g of protein (two uncrustables) down the hatch

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

This is worse than Aarav’s Cade Cunningham take

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

@MateoNacusi So no lazarbeam?

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Just hung out with the girl I like for 3 hours and now I’m eating banana bread in bed watching lazarbeam. Yep this is peak!

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Nutella is to spreads as walking slowly is to modes of transportation

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

@TheoConroy25 I was gonna say it was pretty coordinated from us

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

Apparently the Conroy ancestors passed down a gene that allows us to terribly misread social situations after hearing the plane debacle and then performing similarly last night

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

@TheoConroy25 Currently doing damage control

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

I would describe this past 24 hours of social interaction as Skenes 2026 opening day

[Matthew Conroy @mattyc413]

First thing Aarav says when he wakes up wine drunk to Illinois winning? “Kingston Flemmings is crying like a bitch”