milkkrates

hot and dumb

[That ARC Guy @ThatARCGuy]

💥GIVEAWAY ALERT - Raiders, level up your audio with this legendary loot from @SteelSeries and @ThatARCGuy!

Recycle those blue rare headphones you found in the Buried City for a legendary Arctis Nova Pro Wireless gaming headset - rated the Best Premium Gaming Headset by Gamespot - AND 2400 Raider Tokens, so you can spoil yourself in the ARC Raiders store. One lucky Raider on X will hear it all when they win it all. 🎧

To enter the giveaway:
1. Repost this post
2. Follow @SteelSeries + @ThatARCGuy

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@fabqt Yoo I’ll see you there fab!

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@apexgamingpcs I can’t afford it but I really need it. My stream quality is really bad now handling 1 game application + obs. I wont get picked so here’s some free engagement on your ad 😔

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

Pls someone help me understand https://t.co/FzlNewDEjX

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

Can’t wait to see you there, nerd. We’ll be playing Ascension on Bronzebeard. You Cringe You Drink RETURNS starting at 9PM EST, followed by C*mfessions at 10PM, shaving sub names into my chest at 11 and painting my belly into a jack-o’-lantern at Midnight 🎃
#streamer

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

Idk man, 4 months of unemployment driving me crazy https://t.co/oCf6CbvhTv

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

Idk man, 4 months of unemployment driving me crazy https://t.co/oCf6CbvhTv

[✞Righteous Rebellion𓅪 @OneManCircus87]

What happens when you drink 10 oz of Magnesium Citrate?
I’m glad you asked. Buckle up.

12:05 p.m. — It begins. You down the 10-ounce bottle like it’s a lukewarm PBR at a college tailgate. The label says “cherry flavored,” but it tastes like someone described cherry to a chemist who’s never eaten fruit. Regret sets in instantly.

12:06 p.m. — You grab a handful of chips for moral support. They’ll be liquified before they clear your throat, but who cares? Life still feels okay right now. Remember this peace. You’re about to enter the darkest chapter of your gastrointestinal history.

12:37 p.m. — The rumbling starts. There’s movement in the depths. You’ve got five pounds of impacted regret in your colon, and you just drank the “human-safe” version of Drano. You think it’s go time. It’s not. You get one sad little snake turd — a warm-up act.
That’s the last semi-solid you’ll see for the next 24 hours.

12:57 p.m. — The situation escalates. Your stomach is in full revolt. You have 0.3 seconds to make it to the toilet. Running is risky business — one wrong step and you’ll paint the walls. You pray for sphincter strength like never before as you waddle at Mach 3, pants half down, whispering, “Please, God, not like this.”

12:58 p.m. — Impact.
You sit, and the gates of hell open.
The explosion is biblical. It hits the back of the bowl with such violent force it ricochets like a sprinkler system.
You ask yourself, Is that blood?
No — false alarm. Just the ghost of a cherry pie you ate in 2004. The smell is unspeakable. The acoustics? Terrifying. The neighbors think you’re performing an exorcism.

1:06 p.m. – 8:30 p.m. — Time becomes meaningless. You’ve evacuated everything you’ve ever eaten, plus a few ancestral meals for good measure. Your colon feels like it’s been sandblasted with lava. The burn is real. You’re sweating. Crying. Contemplating life. You meet Jesus briefly, but He sends you back — says your mission’s not over yet.

8:37 p.m. — You’re empty. Broken. Reborn.
Your butthole? A war veteran.
Your spirit? In recovery.
You’ll never be the same, but you will survive.

Tomorrow, you’ll rise from the ashes, slip into your last clean pair of underwear, and waddle into Walmart like a survivor of gastrointestinal warfare — to buy a new toilet brush and reclaim your dignity.

You’ve earned it.

Feeling thankful. 💩🙏

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@InternetH0F I’m so uncomfortable

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@aertemisha Eredar fel mastodon sortathing?

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@svmmichvn Are you alright, DK? It’s ok to tell us if something’s up bc we care about you

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@fabqt Armor too heavy for a banshee ghost horse to fly 🤷🏻‍♂️

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@adeptxo Unc is now aura farming, I’m here to bask in his glow

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@_toxicblonde Step on..

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@tettles @Kalamazii He looks so happy to be helping : D

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@CarlosDgardener No tactics? war of the lions is the best story

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@Warcraft say something

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@Blizzard_Ent @AggrendWoW hey the whole Doomhowl server crashed, please rez all the characters you just killed :(

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@WarcraftDevs

[milkkrates @mdrntoast]

@babybeboopttv Same