meggplantparmesan

sorry about my humble soup

[meggplantparmesan @megyanick]

"can anyone.. can any one.. can any single o n e.. shutthefuckup.. ab anything.. ab any sin g l e thing.. can any single o n e stfu ab any single t h i n g.. for.. an H O U R ?? ?"

[alexa @vampirrria]

when i say “bitch” i mean it in jesse pinkman’s voice

[Trixie Mattel™ @trixiemattel]

Normalize saying “shut up bitch” in a Doctor Phil voice to a baby on a plane.

[Charlie @MoistCr1TiKaL]

It’s so cringe that humans have to sleep, such a waste of time

[chris melberger @chrismelberger]

yoooo let ur cat know i said pspspsps

[meggplantparmesan @megyanick]

there's only 10 more minutes til there's 15 minutes left

[hatsune mitski @zephanijong]

having anxiety is so stupid like what do you mean i'm scared of hanging out with my friends

[ted @tedniv]

what if we discovered that it wasn't a Chinese spy balloon but a race of intelligent space-faring balloons that had evolved from balloons lost by children at amusement parks and they came in peace to bring joy

[caila 🔻 @HEARTAVl]

when their total comes out to $17.38 & i have to act like i dont even care…

[IG: closedapp @ih8rts]

me, knowing nothing changes at midnight

[IG: closedapp @ih8rts]

"santa isn't real" ok, I literally saw him at the mall

[pj @pjayevans]

Hey man do you mind if I have a bite of your skittle