Mel Jonas

Being great is making the people around you better.

[Teddy @Teddy_Taylor27]

Who put tonic in my gin

[Mel Jonas @meljonas18]

If watching a homeless man whip his jacket off and throw it in the trash in the middle of water street and pull out a vest doesn’t scream spring is here idk what does

[Milwaukee Brewers @Brewers]

We tried to write a script. It just wasn't this good. #ThisIsMyCrew

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

my grandfather: i fought off wolves in the alaskan wilderness and had to stitch my own wounds with fishing line

me: there was someone standing near the mailbox so i'll just have to get the mail tomorrow

[cowgiirl aquariius 🤍 @jstradforever]

Bartender: “leave it open?”

Me: “nah, close it”

*5min later*

Me:

[Milwaukee Brewers @Brewers]

When I say M-V, you say P! #PlayBall #ThisIsMyCrew

[N0taaronrodgers @N0tAARONRODGERS]

Miss u

[Mel Jonas @meljonas18]

@jonas_zach Hilarious

[Mel Jonas @meljonas18]

Summerfest in one pick up line: some random stranger: “did you just fart??” Me: blank stare..him:”cuz you just blew me away” 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

[Mel Jonas @meljonas18]

Definitely just scared the shit out of the poor woman who I thought was my Uber driver, by attempting to get into the back seat and realized she had a baby in the back and it indeed wasn’t my Uber 🙃🙃🙃

[Ryan Reynolds @VancityReynolds]

I want to shut this disgusting rumor down before I start it. Yes, there’s a scene in #deadpool2 in which I have adorable little baby legs. In order to achieve this illusion I did NOT sit on an actual baby... For more than a minute. An hour, tops.

[Sean Lowe @SeanLowe09]

My favorite alternative to doing cardio is convincing myself I’m perfect just the way I am.

[MLB Stats @MLBStats]

.@Jhader17 is the first pitcher EVER to strike out 8 batters in an outing less than 3 innings.

[cait @c8_tha_gr8]

Genuinely worse than seeing your ex with a new girl https://t.co/QepZM42eew

[Milwaukee Brewers @Brewers]

#WALKOFF! Ryan Braun crushes one to win it! #NowWeGo

[Mel Jonas @meljonas18]

When the airport transit overhead warns you of abrupt stops and to grab something, they ain’t lying #faceplantingmywaythruatlanta 😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑

[Mel Jonas @meljonas18]

When your gramma asks your grampa who’s picking them up from the airport and you say “you’re favorite grandchild” and she looks at your freaking brother instead of you 😒😒😒🙃🙃🙃🙃