rob from online 📱

online idiot | fighting a perpetual feud w/ the creator of the universe | president & official spokesperson of the unofficial @HelloJessicaFox fan club | he/him

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

mechanic: you used subpar fuel which corroded your injectors and intake manifold

me: uhh english bro

mechanic: low quality gas damaged your engine

me: dumb it down for me kemosabe

mechanic: bad go-go juice make your vroom vroom machine all fucky

me: oh no

[Jessica Fox @HelloJessicaFox]

“humans aren’t monkeys”

[Jessica Fox @HelloJessicaFox]

if twitter dies I’m just gonna roll up all my tweets and shove them into a blowgun and shoot them at your heads

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox curse you

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox ooh he's gonna love that

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox ok now you're just making fun of my failed dolphin wig business

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox @Ryan_Duncan @Clayvage 🫡

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox can't i'm too busy reading united states supreme court cases volume 137

[Jessica Fox @HelloJessicaFox]

Can I pet your dog? Is he a schnauzer? Yeah. What do you think he dreams about? Haha I just mean do you think he dreams he has hands? Human hands? To touch your face? Do you think he dreams about feeling the curve of your cheek with his human hands? Or whatever?

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox i don't think you want to know

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@Clayvage @HelloJessicaFox i actually am an expert though

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox @Clayvage i've seen a few in my time

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox @Clayvage he's right

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox @Clayvage i have an opinion:

giant stripey worm

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@Clayvage @HelloJessicaFox mom can you pick me up i'm being owned online again

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox i'll never forget the day you first said that to me 🥰🥰

[rob from online 📱 @robfromonline]

@HelloJessicaFox please. my options. they are very limited